Page 38 of I see you Beauty

I tense up, and yet, somehow, I still try to enjoy sex with my husband. You need to get out of my head!

I close my eyes and try to give myself completely to Thomas. I can feel his hands firmly on my ass and how he pushes himself into me repeatedly. His lips and tongue play with my breasts and give me goosebumps. There you go…

But when I open my fluttering eyelids again and can still see the dark shadow standing at the window, I can no longer push back the images in my head. They roll over me like a freight train and drag me along with them. Suddenly, it’s no longer Thomas’s hands that are kneading my ass, but I can feel Ezra’s thumb pushing between my cheeks again and pressing against my anus. I remember this incredibly intoxicating feeling again, moaning even louder and riding Thomas harder.

My eyes are fixed on Ezra’s shadow as I move faster, and Thomas thrusts himself deeper into me. I can’t help but feel more aroused by this utterly bizarre situation than ever before. I claw hard into Thomas’s back and leave reddish marks because I’m so caught up in this scene right now.

“God, Cora!” Thomas moans and I can feel him move uncontrollably, knowing he’s about to come.

This burning hot feeling also rushes through my belly and announces my approaching orgasm. I still maintain eye contact with Ezra. Even though his sharp-cut face is more in the dark, I know he won’t take his eyes off me for a second. As I groan loudly because Thomas has hit the right angle, I see Ezra rest his hands on the glass and literally stare over at us. At that exact moment, I come explosively and scream out my pleasure without restraint, as does my husband, who comes in the exact second and spills himself inside me.

My heart is racing and beating so hard against my ribs that I’m worried it might jump out of my chest. We catch our breath for a moment. I close my eyes briefly and slump against Thomas’s shoulder to catch my breath and allow my pulse to normalize. When I open my eyes again, Ezra has disappeared, and I wonder whether I’ve imagined him again or whether he really was watching us.

“Cora… that was incredible,” my husband murmurs against my neck, kissing his way to my lips.

I smile back at him with satisfaction as I slowly lift myself off him. Yes, it was…

Without being able to stop it, my gaze wanders once more to the neighboring house. But I can’t recognize Ezra anywhere. Even if I’ve only imagined it, I still must talk to him tomorrow. This can’t go further between us, so I must end it, and he has to accept it.

Chapter Twenty-Six

I’m angry, Beauty. So incredibly angry with you…

Iknow you are married, and it won’t be easy to separate from your husband for good so we can be together. I want to give you the time you need. I knew you would still let him fuck you. But like this?

I watched you last time when I found you drunk, half-naked, and horny in your pavilion and had to take advantage of the moment. He used you for his own pleasure and completely forgot about you. But just now? You rode him like you were only supposed to ride me. You gave yourself to him completely and then let him feel your claws. Little lioness, they are only meant for me. Only my back should be adorned with your marks, and only I should be able to feel them deep in my skin. You make me angry, Beauty.

But I mustn’t get angry because if I do, someone will die. You’re supposed to be my calming influence. Ground me. Bring me down and overwrite my terrible memories with wonderful shared experiences.

But what happened… Beauty, you have no idea what you’re doing to me here… You’re conjuring up dark creatures that lie dormant inside me, and they want you just as much as I want you. But they must never have you because everything I’ve ever loved has been taken from me by my dark inner self. That can’t happen to you! It won’t happen to you! I will look after you better than anyone else because you are special. You are mine…

Chapter Twenty-Seven

The rest of the weekend was fairly quiet and routine. I haven’t seen Ezra since, and to be honest, I’ve been avoiding him on purpose. I didn’t want my husband pick up on anything when I told Ezra we were done.

I’m scared to admit that I’m avoiding the conversation because I’m worried it will turn out badly. Not because I think Ezra might freak out like Thomas would. No. He’s not that type of guy. I don’t think Ezra would do that. But I’m still avoiding it. I haven’t changed my mind because I will stay with my husband and work on our marriage.

Thomas wanted me to take a few more days off to recover from all the stress of the last few days. I would have preferred to work simply because it would give me something to do, but at least this way, I can finally put my tools in my new shed and care for my beloved garden. I have, therefore, canceled the gardener for the week so I can do it myself.

After hours of tidying up, I finally finish organizing the shed and stand back, satisfied with my work. Now I can take a quick shower before preparing dinner, ensuring it's ready on time.

I’m about to leave the garden shed when I freeze in my tracks. Ezra is leaning in the doorway, blocking my exit. I didn’t hear him approach and have no idea how long he’s been standing there.

“You seem to be getting along with your husband again,” he says. So you were there after all…

It’s good to know I wasn’t imagining him. That means my decision to stay with my husband is right. Ezra and I have no future—what would that even look like? Living together next door to my ex-husband? No! Ex-husband…? That can only end in disaster. So I’ll pull the ripcord before I do something I can’t undo.

I haven’t wholly cheated on my husband yet, and the two little slip-ups where Ezra satisfied me… I try to remember that Thomas isn’t innocent, either. That makes it easier for me to forgive myself somehow and keep my guilty conscience in check.

“Ezra… listen…” I begin with a sigh and step a little closer to him.

“I didn’t like what I saw, Beauty,” he interrupts me in a dark voice. Excuse me?

“He’s my husband, Ezra! I will not talk to you about when and how I have sex with him,” I counter forcefully.

His eyebrow twitches upward dangerously, but there’s no threat from him. I’m not afraid Ezra will blow up like a rocket, as is often the case with my husband. But he can’t talk to me like that. Especially not here!

This conversation absolutely must stay between us. I have no desire to become the laughingstock of our neighborhood because I made a pass at the young single guy. Because that’s exactly how everyone would interpret it, dragging me and my marriage through the mud. Again…

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