Page 59 of Some Things Never Change

Not really, I silently answered. I had been sleepless all week with too much on my mind and emotions to feel to truly sleep in peace. Never once had I ever been up late into the night, even as a teen, thinking of Andy and deciding what to do. But the fire of him consumed my mind practically every second of the day this entire past week.

If I didn’t lie awake in the middle of the night thinking of him, then I would dream of the curves of his face, the gentleness of his fingertips, and those hazel green eyes like a broken record. He consumed my mind and soul, like the lovesick teenager I once was.

“Hmm?” I responded, looking over at him.

Even with only his side profile facing me, I knew his brows creased together. Looking back to the highway ahead of us, I’m surprised there wasn't as much traffic as there should be for a Friday night.

“You seem so quiet and distant lately,” he stated, sounding dejected.

I felt too much to pretend nothing was going on and I kept my distance from him ever since this past Sunday. My interactions with him dwindled down to the bare minimum all week. So much so that I hadn’t said much at all since the beginning of our hours-long drive back to our hometown.

“I-I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel uncomfortable with my banter. That was never my intention.”

“It’s alright, Andy. I know you were just joking most of the time anyway.”

“But… You're a bit withdrawn with me lately. It’s as if you’ve been avoiding me. I want to say I missed talking and hanging out with you like we usually do, but I know it would just make you uneasy.”

My heart thumped hard at his words. I was never truly angry at his flirty banter. I knew he loved to tease me every chance he got. But all that flirting was just pretty, empty words. If he was going to say them to anyone, then it should be said to the one he was in love with. Not me.

“I’ve just been thinking about a lot of things and needed time alone.”

“Like what?”

This weekend was my dad’s death anniversary, and I had always felt it was best to be home around this day. Especially with this year marking twenty long years since he’d been gone. In the previous years, I had been busy with life and work and it had been a struggle to come back home around this time. But this year hadn’t been the same.

Maybe it was because I wasn’t being overworked the way I used to be. Or, perhaps those early morning workouts made me more grounded throughout my days. Or, I’m just finally satisfied with where I’m at in my life. As we passed the hilly, more desolate stretch of our drive and into the tip of the lush valley we were from, I shrugged.

“I was actually thinking about our parents.” I came to a short pause. And you. “And everything after my dad passed away. Like, how we became neighbors and practically family.”

This wasn’t a complete lie. In the midst of being consumed by my feelings for Andy, I also thought about my dad, his untimely death, my family, and the Hugheses.

Being Hmong immigrants from a third world country with little-to-no education and knowing no English, my parents knew they had to get some form of education, and learning English was the key to achieving the American dream. My dad worked his ass off to learn English, then took night classes to get his high school diploma. He went on to get a college associate’s degree in business. Although it was hardly much higher education, it meant a lot to my parents, who barely had an education before coming to America.

Meanwhile, my mom tried to balance being a mom and working full-time at the meat processing factory where both my parents worked. As I learned the English alphabet through my kindergarten homework, my mom also practiced with me. She knew basic English, but I also taught her whatever bits I learned from school as well. My mom eventually did what my dad did. She learned English, got her high school diploma, and eventually her associates degree. She finally got her bachelors in business management just two years ago.

My parents worked extremely hard to get to where they were when my dad passed away. His work newly promoted him as a supervisor at work and my mom was soon to be in the same position in another division as well. In the middle of all this happiness, we also bought a decently sized home in a safe neighborhood exactly like what my dad dreamed of. But that wasn’t without the hustle and grind both my parents did every single day.

My dad was one of the hardest working men I had ever known. He did everything he possibly could to make our family’s life a little better, except for learning how to rest. All his hard work came crashing down when he didn’t wake up one morning. He died in his sleep due to an aneurysm. My parents got married young and were only in their early thirties. So, his death had been shocking and unbelievably sad.

After my dad passed away, the Hugheses moved in next door. They moved from Minnesota to California just five years prior and nestled in the northern, very affluent part of town. With a dad with a growing, successful contracting business and a mom as a high school French teacher, the Hughes’ were a wealthy family compared to mine.

“I still can’t believe your parents moved all the way across town like that,” I said. “I still think about that beautiful house you guys used to live in.”

“What do you mean?” asked Andy. “I would rather live next door to you and your family any day than in that house.”

"Yeah, but that house was huge. I wouldn't mind having my own pool and backyard like that.”

Before moving next door to us, I vaguely remembered they lived in a large brand new house with a huge backyard and gigantic pool. I’m still shocked they even made the sacrifice of giving up that beautiful home just to live next door to us. All because Auntie Gao loved my mom that much. They both always said that their love for one another was as deep as any sisters born from the same parents. With all that Auntie Gao had done for our family to support my mom, Jonathan, and me, I truly believed that.

"Trust me, it was just a big house with a pool. That’s it. It was nice and all, but it never compared to me being able to walk over and hang out with you and Jonathan whenever I wanted. Or having an amazing sleepovers with you two." Andy chuckled.

I smiled, feeling the butterflies flutter in my stomach. "Yeah, I loved how easy it was to hang out with you and Anthony, too. I honestly miss those sleepovers. My overprotective mom was always so lax with you two around, so we got away with so many things.”

“I know. Our parents were the same with you and Jonathan, but your mom has always been the best—letting us stay up late and never questioning why we were still up when she got home at four in the morning.” Andy laughed, making my stomach flip at how cute he sounded. “She even got us McDonald’s on her way home from her night shifts.”

“There were too many nights when you guys stayed up late. If I was a parent, I’d be like your parents.” I shook my head, thinking about how the guys stayed up all night and then slept the entire day.

“Oh, come on, Tink! We were teens and that’s what teens do best. Remember how we used to sleep on the living room floor all the time?”

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