Page 4 of Size Doesn't Matter

He laughed brightly. “No, no, I’m no good on the ice. My friend is a figure skater, though, and I went to a fundraiser for the rink a few years back.”

I nodded. “So, it’s nothing but an old T-shirt?”

“Yeah, you could say that.” He shrugged and glanced around the empty library, his gaze settling back on me after a few seconds. “Hey, it’s getting late. Wanna…go back to my place? Or yours, I’m not picky.”

My smile faded. “On the first date?”

Nico raised his eyebrows. “Yeah, why not? I’m attracted to you, you’re attracted to me, and when two people are attracted to each other…” he made a gross gesture with his fingers, which I took as my cue to get up and leave.

“I’m sorry, I’m not interested in hooking up right away. I thought this first date was to get to know each other, and we could see where things took us from there. But if sex is all you’re looking for, I’m afraid you’ve been matched with the wrong monster. Goodbye, Nico. It was lovely to meet you.”

3

NICO

“No, Cyrus, wait! Please don’t go just yet.” I grabbed his arm, or at least tried to, but my fingers barely fit around half of his tricep.

Cyrus paused, looking back at me with a disappointed dullness in his eyes. One date in and I’d already screwed things up, possibly beyond repair.

“Are you truly only looking for a casual relationship, or are you interested in something more?”

“Something more,” I said a little too quickly. “I want to get to know you better, and I thought, what better way than to get as intimate as two people can be?”

He raised an eyebrow, thick and heavy, before scoffing. “I don’t believe you for a second, but I like your confidence – unfounded as it may be. Tell me, Nico, have you ever been with an orc before?”

I shook my head. “But I’m willing to learn. Please, give me a chance.”

Cyrus sighed. “Quite a lesson it will be, then. I doubt you’re ready for sex with me, and I don’t think that having a go at it on the first date is a good idea at all.”

“But –“

“I wasn’t finished speaking. I was going to say that, against my better judgment, I will allow you to come home with me. I cannot promise that anything will happen, but I would like to get to know you a little better before making a decision that both of us might live to regret. I try not to regret anything in my life, and I’ve been rather successful thus far. I will not let you be the one to break my streak.”

I stared at him for a minute while I tried to figure out if we were going to fuck tonight or not. I didn’t dare to ask after nearly losing my date entirely, so I followed Cyrus out of the library like a lost lamb looking for its mother. I waved awkwardly at the Librarian, who gave me a pointed look before turning away to write something down.

I had no idea how they thought Cyrus and I would be a good match unless the only reason we got paired together was because he was an orc. If that was it, then I wasn’t satisfied with the matchmaking service at all, and I planned on telling them as much when I came back to find a new date.

“You wanna go back to your place or mine?” I asked as we stepped out into the warm spring evening.

A breeze rustled the leaves of the trees in front of the library and I realized I was a little underdressed for the season still, even with summer fast approaching.

“Where do you live?” Cyrus asked.

“Oh, a couple of blocks from here in an apartment. It’s nothing special, just a one-bedroom, but I keep it pretty clean.”

He eyed me skeptically. “We’ll go to my house. It’s quite small as well, but it’s a nice drive from here and I suspect it’s much tidier than you say yours is.”

I shrugged. “You’re probably right. Hey, are all orcs neat freaks? Because I read –“

“Forget what you read. All orcs are different, much like humans. Some are slobs who clean once a year at best, and some keep their spaces immaculate. I fall somewhere in between, although I do prefer a well-organized life than one in which I pray I can find what I’m looking for in a timely manner.”

“You talk a lot, don’t you?” I said as we walked through the parking lot.

“Does that bother you?” Cyrus asked.

I shrugged again. “Not really, it was just an observation. I talk quite a bit too – that’s what I’ve been told, anyway.”

We stopped in front of Cyrus’ vehicle, a short truck that had a comically tall cab. I would have laughed if I didn’t think it would be rude.

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