Page 10 of Promise You Forever

We work together in silence as Grandpa hums and works on his puzzle. Every time a memory about being in this kitchen with him tries to surface, I force it down by thinking of Brandon. Which reminds me to check my phone in case he called while I was napping. I tap the screen to look for notifications but only see a text from Amber telling me she’s all settled in with Colt.

“How are you?” Luke’s voice is pitched low, quiet enough not to travel across the room.

I stiffen as his arm brushes against mine while he brushes garlic butter onto the loaf of Italian bread he toasted in the oven. Why is the most innocent of touches so electric when it comes from him? I’m sure it was accidental, but it irritates me, nonetheless.

“Fine.”

I can feel his gaze on me as I chop the tomato in front of me.

“You don’t seem fine.”

I set the knife down and turn to him. “What are you doing?”

“Asking you if you’re okay.”

“We don’t have to do this. I appreciate that you’ve been so great to my grandparents, truly I do. But you and me?” I gesture back and forth between us. “We don’t have to pretend.”

“Who’s pretending?”

His face lacks any trace of the scowl that was once permanently affixed to it. When I look up into his glacier blue eyes, all I see is genuine concern, and it nearly breaks me. At one point in my life, I would have melted into his embrace and let him shield me from the pain of this reality, but with a cruelty so casual, he broke that trust with just a few words.

“I can’t do this.” I grab the hand towel and dry my hands. “I’ll reheat dinner later.”

“No.” He grabs my hand and stops me. “I’ll eat later. You enjoy a meal with Paul. I’m sorry.” His eyes move back and forth between mine as if trying to hammer the apology into my mind.

He waits until I give him a little nod and instructs me to cut up Grandpa’s food into smaller bites, so he doesn’t choke. He turns and leaves with his shoulders slumped, like our interaction wounded him.

Four

LUKE

Sleep is just closing in on me when I hear Paul yelling downstairs. Dread courses through my body as I yank my door open and see Eli’s already wide open, room empty. Nighttime is the worst for Paul, it’s why I moved in because Jo wasn’t able to handle him on her own.

Right as I make it to the living room I watch in horror as Paul’s fist connects with Eli’s face. Charlie growls and steps between them as I reach Paul and spin him around. His eyes are glassy and wild, and for a brief second, he doesn’t recognize me either. My heart screams for me to go Eli, but I know the most important thing is getting Paul back to bed.

She’s holding her hand over her cheek and fighting back tears as she makes eye contact with me. She points up the stairs and starts moving quickly with Charlie on her heels. Knowing that she’s okay for now, I turn my full attention to Paul.

“Why was there a stranger in my house in the middle of the night?”

“She’s not a stranger, Paul. She’s your granddaughter.”

“I only have a son.” His voice takes on a belligerent edge that I know too well. “And where is Jo? I want to see my wife, damn it.”

“Let’s get you back in your room, and I’ll go look for her.”

I feel guilty lying, but he won’t remember it in the morning. I lead him back into his room and help him into his bed. His pill container is still closed, and all his nighttime meds are still inside. My shoulders loosen. This episode is probably just from the stress combined with him not remembering his medication.

I wait a torturous few minutes after he swallows the pills to make sure he falls asleep before heading up to check on Eli. After a quick side trip to grab a bag of peas from the freezer, I take the steps two at a time and jog down the hall where I find her door open. Light filters out from around the bathroom door.

After a split-second debate on whether or not to knock, I push the door open. Best to not give her a chance to rebuff my assistance. She doesn’t even realize I’m behind her as she cries, her hands over her face and shoulders shaking with each sob.

“Sunbeam.” The nickname slips from my lips quietly before I even think better of it. The fact of the matter is that she’s never not been Sunbeam in my heart. She was the warmth and light in my life while I had her. I’m never letting that go.

Her eyes, glassy and red, snap up to mine in the reflection of the mirror. I hold my hands up, signaling that I come in peace.

“Is Grandpa okay?”

“He’s fine. Nights are always the worst for him. I’m more concerned about you at the moment. Can I see your eye?”

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