Page 57 of Under His Watch

“See!” Nina laughed. “I told you. Did you fess up and tell him what you wanted?”

“It was more like both of us talking and explaining a few things.” I shrugged, shy yet not. This was the first time I’d ever contributed to a conversation like this. It was new. Fun. And freeing. I never could’ve done something like this in my former life, the nonstop working existence I suffered through before I met Romeo.

“Wow. I can totally see the difference in him,” Eva said. “He’s always been so serious, but just watching him here tonight, he’s more relaxed somehow.”

I rubbed my neck, wondering if I could really have that much impact on him. “I wonder how long it will last.”

“What? Like how long the newness of it will last?” Nina asked.

“That too. But I mean how long he’ll want me like this.” Now my nerves crept in.

“What isthis, though?” Eva asked. “Did he say? Or did you?”

I shook my head. “We haven’t labeled it.”I wouldn’t know how.“We’re basically living together and sleeping together. But…” I shrugged.

“That’s a good start.” Nina was still all smiles.

“But I don’t know if I’m good enough to last.”

Eva rolled her eyes.

“Hey, of course you are,” Nina said, laughing me off.

“From the little I saw when you two arrived, he worships the ground you walk on, Tessa.” Eva sounded so sure. I envied her confidence.

“A man doesn’t look at a woman like that unless he’s in deep,” Nina said. “No pun intended.”

We all giggled, smiling and having fun with the bawdy talk.

“It’s just so new. And he’s my first anything. First time having sex—when I wanted it.” I grimaced at the reminder that I’d lost my virginity when I was raped. “If Romeo is my boyfriend, if that’s the right label for him, he’s my first.”

“How naïve,” Eva deadpanned.

Nina threw a decorative pillow at her. “Be nice.”

“I’m honest,” Eva argued.

“I am, though. Naïve. I can tell my inexperience is so not what he’s used to.” And I hated that feeling. I knew he’d had sex before. He was almost ten years older than me. Of course, he’d been around the block. “I don’t mean the sheer amount of experience, comparing my history to his. It’s more the…” I rolled my hand.

“What?” Nina asked, eager and on the edge of her seat.

“Thekindof experience,” I said, wincing and feeling less-than somehow. I wanted to please Romeo however I could, but I wasn’t sure how to educate myself and be more prepared to impress him other than what he told me. I doubted a man wanted to coach their partner througheverything.

Other than that terrifying moment when his fingers near my ass made me tense up and struggle with triggered memories of being raped, I enjoyed all that he pushed me to feel. Surrendering to him was liberating somehow, but I got the sense that he wanted more.

“Oh.” Nina furrowed her brow. “I think I know what you mean. Romeo’s so… intense and serious.” She nodded and glanced at Eva, as though seeking confirmation from someone who’d known him longer. “He’d be a hard lover, I’m guessing. More serious than playful.”

Eva hummed in agreement. “I know exactly what you mean,” she confided in me, again with that firm confidence that she had no matter what she talked about. She wasn’t light and fluffy. The stunning brunette was almost as serious as Romeo seemed to be.

“He’s adarkkind of lover,” she summarized. “He used to go to clubs with Franco.”

I winced. “Sex clubs?” I’d never measure up to the kinks there.

“Yeah. BDSM, too, but he wasn’t that hardcore, I don’t think.” She held up her hands in surrender and tilted her head to the side. “My cousin’s—and uncle’s—sexual appetite is none of my business. Please, never mistake my willingness to chat about this in a general sense for an invite to unload details.”

Nina smiled, fighting back laughter.

“But I understand what you mean,” Eva commiserated. “I imagine that Romeo would just show you what he wanted and all.”

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