Page 43 of The Bones of the Cursed

The morning after Kailu left, Malakai joined me where I sat glumly at the fire and made sure I ate breakfast. I tried to argue with him, but he wouldn’t relent. Then he sat there and made sure I ate the whole bowl of food.

Since then, I’ve been forced to deal with Hendrix and his mothering. Not to mention Malakai’s constant hovering.Malakai thinks that I don’t notice him lingering outside my tent when I go to sleep, but I do. I can sense him there, and I’m fairly certain the one time I was crying I heard a pained groan.

When the shock wore off, the pain started to become anger. It’s been fermenting for four days, and with each hour that passes, I become even more pissed.

Malakai barks orders to the group, taking charge and laying down plans in order to keep everyone safe. The plan is to continue south towards Bone Valley to where the last traces of Elion and the others were found, following the original plan Kailu laid out. Word from another patrol unit reached us by letter to report another ghoul attack, this one in Selianthe. The casualties were minimal but more soldiers were taken. The attacks grow closer and closer to Percius. I watch everything unfold in front of me, annoyed at being left out.

Everyone has been treating me like I’m breakable, like I’m made of glass. They think some male leaving me will render me somehow too fragile, too easy to break. I want to, but I am too damn stubborn to give any person that kind of power over me. I won’t let him know he broke me, or at least whatever was left of me.

After our parents died, Elion kept me from losing myself. He taught me to be strong and fight. Hannah kept me grounded when he was away and my job kept me busy. After Elion, it was Kailu who centered me, even when I couldn’t stand him.

That’s the problem, though. I’ve relied on everyone else to keep me content. No more, though. Relying on other people has only brought me heartache.

It’s time I stand on my own.

The landscape is barren, birch trees few and far between. The temperature is sweltering, the ground fried from the intense sun and lack of shade. I’m keenly aware of the sweat trickling down my back as I hold tightly to Malakai. We ride until sunsetis upon us, the air cooling as the sun sinks, offering a much-needed reprieve. We decide on a small area in between two trees to camp, just off the trail we rode on, but far enough away that any passersby wouldn’t notice us. A light breeze changes the temperature drastically now that the sun has set.

I walk to the creek bordering our campsite and take a deep breath that smells like fresh autumn air and listen to the trickle of water.

A pang shoots through my heart.

Water reminds me of Kailu, his stupid power of water wielding. And he does it so beautifully. I’m even more upset knowing I may not ever find out what he shifts into.

Shaking my head, I sink to my knees and stare at my reflection on the rippling surface. My face looks pale and tired. The dark circles under my eyes are now impossible to hide. I flip my palms up and stare at my hands, wishing I had the power to make myself disappear.

Footsteps approach from behind, but I don’t turn. I already know who it is. He smells of leather, musk, and a hint of citrus. The breeze lets me know when he’s near far sooner than he thinks. Malakai followed me the minute I left the campsite, my own little shadow.

Since Kailu ran away, Malakai has hardly left my side, though he hasn’t flirted or made any innuendos like he did when I first met him. He comes across as crass and arrogant, and he definitely is, but he is also a hard worker and cares deeply for the safety of the realm.

Rain hits my palms and I stare at the drops as they fall.

No, not rain.

Tears.

I’m not sure when I started crying, but now that I have, I can’t seem to stop. I try to sniffle quietly, hoping he won’t hear, but my efforts are in vain. His stupid Fae ears pick up on every noisein a twenty-mile radius. He boasted about it one night at the campfire, when the Fae were arguing about whose senses were stronger.

Now, he sits down next to me without uttering a word. In just four days, this male has picked up on my biggest fear.

Maybe I’m just that transparent, or maybe that’s a pretty common fear, but I appreciate the kind gesture either way. Somehow, it just makes me cry harder, each sob feeling as if it hopes to crack my ribcage open, reveal to the world just how battered and bruised my heart truly is.

He scoots closer and pulls me into him. I’m stiff at first, not sure what to do. The only time I’ve been this close to him was when the ghoul poisoned me. It feels nice to have this moment of comfort, so instead of second guessing myself, I take what he offers and let his arms wrap around me. His chin rests gently on my head as my tears slowly subside.

The sound of the stream and his scent lull me into a sense of calm. I should apologize for getting my tears and snot on him, but instead I enjoy the silence that cocoons us.

After a while, I just decide to ask what I’ve been wanting to know for days.

“Do you know why he left?”

Malakai slowly rubs circles on my right shoulder with his thumb. “He believes he’s doing the right thing. He thought it would make it easier for you if you didn’t have to see him every day.”

I swallow hard, though it feels as if a rock is lodged in my throat. “It has to do with the cave, doesn’t it? Why did that happen? What does it even mean?”

His thumb stops its circular motion. I feel him take a deep breath. “It isn’t important right now. Just know that he didn’t leave because of anything you did.”

I sit up and look at him. His eyes are silver, though in acertain light I’ve seen them almost look white. His long hair is deep brown, almost black, and shaved on one side. Sometimes a strand falls into his face and I have the urge to push it back. His eyebrows are sharp, his square jaw shadowed with day-old stubble. His aquiline nose turns slightly up at the end. His lips are full, the upper lip just a little plusher than his bottom.

He really is the epitome of “bad boy” with his all-black trousers, heavy boots, and thin shirts that seem to be molded to his muscles. Not to mention the tattoos. But his personality and kindness betray his outward appearance.

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