Page 138 of Unexpected Redemption

And as my vision clears, the look in his eyes shows me his decision before he says the words.

Sadly, he isn’t choosing to be my father.

His face falls, a crumpled look of confusion barely visible through the facial hair.“Lettie, there’s nothing to choose. If he is there, it’s because he has the intel to take down one of the rings.”He points at the board, where the columns of information sit, each of them representing a whole host of crimes. “Every time a ring falls, it brings us closer to ending Nikolai and everything he stands for.”

I glance around the room, concerned eyes looking at me with some form of disgust or pity. They want to eliminate the entire monster on the wall. Perhaps I’m wrong for vehemently wanting to see one column destroyed more than the others.

Yeah. I’m selfish to merely consider sacrificing the other crimes just to eliminate one man. That disgusting excuse for a human sitting there, waiting for Redleg to offer him a get-out-of-jail-free card.

Stupid, selfish Lettie.

Then again... is it selfish? Or is that my raising doing the talking for me?

You know what. Fuck that. I amnotbeing selfish.

He is.

His priorities are fucked to high heaven.

Big Al has never been my father, and it’s stupid for me to expect him to be now. He’s barely spoken to me since I blew in here like a CAT-5 hurricane over a month ago.

If he wanted to, he would.

Busy or not. Mafia battle or not.

If he wanted to know me, he would be well on his way by now.

Tomer wanted to earn me back and love me, even with all this shit going on. And he does it.

Every damn minute of every damn day.

“Never mind.” I lower my eyes and take a step backward. Then another. “Do what you’re gonna do. What I want or believe don’t matter none, anyhow. What do I know? I’m just a hillbilly who was never so much as a glint in your eye.”

Without another word, I turn on my heeland take my seat beside Sammy. Once I lower onto the chair, I cross my hands and rest them in my lap. Shoulders rolled back and chin raised, I make it clear I’m done fighting a useless battle.

There’s an aching slowness to my movements as my gaze trails from the carpet to the main console monitor, looking pointedly past my... past Boss.

Struck mute, he stands there long enough for my guilt to fester.

A lifetime of forced manners shakes my resolve.

Maybe I shouldn’t be here. I’m an unnecessary distraction to theiroh-so-importantmission.

If it weren’t for the man wearing body cam number four on the wall of screens, there’d be no reason for me to watch. Yet I love him with every ounce of my being, so here I shall sit until I know he’s on his way home to me. Safely.

“Lettie, I-I-I don’t understand what’s happening,” Alan stammers, uncharacteristically shaken. “What do you expect me to do?”

“Resume your mission. After all, I’m only collateral damage to the war between Redleg and Lenkov.”

It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him that I wouldn’t have been taken if he didn’t have this fucking war to begin with. But I’m choosing the high road. Just because I’m hurt doesn’t mean I need to hurt someone else.

I won’t be a spoke in the cycle of pain.

He takes two steps toward me, his eyes and posture warming. As he opens his mouth to say something I don’t much care to hear, he’s cut off.

“Boss, we have a problem,” Mia interjects.

We avert our eyes to the screens, and a murmur of curses befalls the group.

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