Page 61 of Rum Sips and Salty Lips

“I mean, Cancun would be fun. Just a lot of open water between here and there,” he says to Bristol. I can’t listen to what he’s saying.

“Can you move your foot so I can sit?” I say in an even voice. Bristol rolls her eyes and shifts to the other side of the bar.

He knows what I’m doing. Knows I’m not sitting next to him. “Plenty of other seats.”

It’s true. I want to fight with him because it feels like the only safe way to connect.

“I wantthisone.” My hands grip the backrest.

He raises an eyebrow. “If you can move it, you can have it.”

It’s performance. I pretend like I can’t move it. He pretends like he’s putting in some resistance. I call him a selfish asshole. He calls me a cold princess.

I head to my table and pretend I wasn’t thinking about warming everything up for him.

On Saturday,I decide if I get married, I won’t have the over-the-top event Sienna’s planning.

She doesn’t even want this. But her in-laws want to make it a big deal, and they’re paying for everything. I’m sure Sienna would be pulling her hair out if she wasn’t concerned about how it’d look in a few weeks. Beckett’s mom, Lisa, is wonderful and more than happy to help with planning and doting on Sienna while she’s home.

His parents own Coastline Beach House, a luxury resort at the southern end of the island. The family has been an institution for generations. I have always been surprised by their kindness and the responsibility they feel for their property and the surrounding environment. They were the first to give me a job teaching yoga when I was in college and had gotten my certification. I loved starting my days with sunrise yoga on the beach with their guests.

I’m a little jealous of the bond Sienna and Beckett’s mom share. I’m not close with my mother, and I can’t imagine being close with a mother-in-law.

I fight the urge to text Orion and ask about his mom.

I will not spend the day imagining what my and Orion’s wedding would be like. It’s a terrible idea to even have these thoughts, and I don’t know why my mind goes there. I want to believe there is a chance for a future together. But no matter what happened between us on the boat the other day, this is only temporary. It won’t happen again. We said it was a one-time thing.

With my mother’s negative attitude toward commitment, it was a surprise to her that I even bothered to be serious withHamilton. I was trying to make my father proud, trying to do something that would make good business sense and open doors for me.

Neither parent thought a partner would be responsible for my emotions or feelings.

Sienna, Haley, and I have dinner reservations, but I have a little bit of time to unwind first. I head home, grateful Sienna isn’t staying with me. I need some time to decompress and rest before I can deal with people again. And I feel fucking terrible for wanting that. I should appreciate the people around me more. I believe life is fleeting and we should take advantage of every moment. But I just want to drink a glass of wine alone and watch reality TV.

I scroll through my streaming services but my attention is torn when Orion plays music loudly in his backyard.Does he have people over? Why didn’t he invite me?Panic creeps into my thoughts. But I don’t hear any other voices outside.

Maybe I missed something. Did he text me he was kayaking, and I never acknowledged, and something happened? Did I drive over one of his plants?

I flip through our texts. He’s been silent since Thursday.

He might have been sailing the last two days. Would it be weird if I asked for his schedule? I watch out for him when he kayaks. It should be the same when he’s sailing. Someone should always be waiting for him to come home.

I stop avoiding it and look out my window. He’s sitting in his backyard with a drink in his hand.

He’s provoking me. This is bait. I should let it go. But maybe he needs me like I need him.

I want to be the person he turns to when he needs something, at least for now. He’ll eventually move on. But I’ll hold on to him for as long as I can.

I want to see where this is headed.

I storm out of my house. Our back fence is low and it’s easy to see across each property from the porch. I’m in his line of sight but he doesn’t react.

“Does it have to be so loud?” I yell.

“I can’t hear you,” he says.

I let out a breath and go around so I’m in his yard. He has a smug grin on his face, and I notice the drink in his hand isn’t a beer like I assumed.

“Now you’re blocking my view,” he declares.

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