Page 86 of Rum Sips and Salty Lips

I feel like I’ve been knocked on my ass. That wasn’t where I thought she was taking this conversation. “If you don’t have feelings for him now, then why would you want to have tried harder? He belittles your company every chance he gets. He doesn’t respect what you’ve done or your values.”

She rubs her forehead. “I don’t know. I feel like it was a waste of a few years if it didn’t work out. A mistake. I could have been using my time doing something else productive.”

A full storm rages in my head. Is that what she thinks of us? That if this relationship doesn’t end in marriage, it’s a waste of time and a mistake? Is that why she doesn’t want to tell anyone, because then it would be admitting failure? Is that what I’m fighting against?

Fuck this.

I grab her by the back of the head and pull her mouth to mine. “We’re not a mistake.”

“What?”

I don’t respond. Instead, I pick her up and turn her to the bed. From there, it’s a well-practiced race to get each other’s clothes off.

“Your suit. We need to hang it up,” she says, trying to sit up.

I pin her down. “It’s getting cleaned anyway. Leave it.”

I kiss my way down her body, feeling the vibrations in her chest as she hums her approval. She runs her hands through my hair. I’ll never cut it. The longer it is, the more time I can keep her attached to me.

We’re in my bed. I should be rough with her. She’ll expect that, but I don’t want to.

So I take her hands and pin them above her head. “I don’t have a tie, so you’ll have to exhibit some self-control. These stay here.”

“No sailor’s knots?”

“Not today.” I nibble on her ear and she laughs.

I spread her legs and use one finger to find her already wet for me. I lower onto her and drown in the taste of her.

Thisis what I can do. I stay here and get her close to an orgasm over and over, until she’s begging for it. And show her, even if it doesn’t work out between us, that the time we spend together is worth it. She’s not better served by researching fabric or practicing her handstand.

She’s about to break, and the selfless thing would be to push her over the edge and have mercy on her. But I want to feel it when she does.

I thrust into her and it’s enough for her waves to crash. I still and feel her shatter beneath me.

“You okay?” I ask when it’s over. I’m dying to move, but I need to know she can take more. My forehead rests on hers.

“Yeah.” Her breath is shallow.

“Good.” I kiss her and roll my hips. Her arms reach around my back and her legs around my waist.

I can’t let her go. I’ve known that from the first time. I’ve always worried she’ll run, but I thought I had more time with her.

Today I start to wonder if the clock is already running down.

thirty-three

CARINA

Orion comeswith a loud groan into my neck, right as my second orgasm hits me. I don’t know how he always does it.

Something was different that time. He’s thinking, and I’m not sure what about.

We’re both exhausted and drift off to sleep. When we wake up a little bit later, he’s watching me.

“Tell me how this whole thing started,” he asks.

“How what started?”

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