Page 87 of Mother Pucker

Go on, though, I don’t mind one bit.

They skate around for another ten minutes, giggling and talking, while I stay a few feet behind them, thinking about everything over the past couple of months.

Thankfully, there haven’t been any more pictures posted online of me and Shay, but I’m sure the media frenzy will start when news gets out of us moving in together. But given she’s no longer my physical therapist, we’re ready to handle things as they come. We have nothing to hide.

I’m just thinking about the move as soon as I get back from being on the road–what life will be like living with so many other people–when, all of a sudden, a couple of oblivious teenagersskate toward Kai and Winnie. She moves out of the way, and I’m preparing to tell Kai to watch out when his face morphs into surprise, and he narrowly misses running into them.

But in that effort, he tumbles backward, trying to right his footing. I reach out for him, but I’m not close enough to catch him.

I hear him grunt and the unmistakablethudas his body crashes onto the unforgiving ice, his hands desperately trying to break his fall.

Fuck!

“Kai!” I holler, rushing to his side, my heart flapping like a hummingbird’s wings inside my chest. “Are you okay?”

God, please tell me you’re okay.

My stomach drops when I see the pooled tears in his eyes and the pronounced frown pulling down his lips. He holds his wrist with his other hand, trying to straighten up his face after seeing Winnie’s concerned gaze on him.

Sniffling, he swallows. “I . . . I hurt my wrist.”

I nod, though my throat feels like it’s closing. I’ve seen tons of injuries on the ice. Hell, I’ve broken my nose, gotten plenty of cuts and bruises over the years, and have even broken my wrist. But the look on this kid’s face, coupled with the way he’s holding his wrist, makes me feel like I’m experiencing the pain myself.

Careful not to jostle his arm and wrist, I haul him up into my arms, laying a kiss on his temple before telling Winnie to follow close behind me. “I got you, buddy. Just hang tight for a minute.”

Placing him on a bench outside the rink, I examine his wrist closely, asking him to move it this and that way to study his range of motion. It’s swelling up fast, and based on the way he’s wincing–not letting me even touch it–I need to take him to the hospital to get it checked out.

Given the way Kai is more wincing than crying and the minimal bruising, I don’t think it’s broken, but there’s no way to know for sure until I take him to see a doctor.

My stomach drops, thinking about the phone call I’m going to have to make to Shay on my way.

Jesus. Theone fucking timeshe trusted me to take care of her kid, and I messed it up! Theone fucking timeI was supposed to protect him, he ended up hurt.

What the hell was I thinking bringing the kids here, outside the safety of a private rink? What the hell was I thinking, convinced I knew how to take care of kids? I’m not fucking fit for this; I’m not fit to raise a child with her if I can’t even anticipate obvious accidents like these.

I don’t have the time to think about the repercussions for our relationship when Shay finds out. Right now isn’t the time to think about us, not when my priority is Kai.

But given how important Kai’s safety has always been for Shay, could I blame her for faulting me for not taking care of him today?

Could I blame her for walking away from me, if that’s what she chooses to do?

I pace around the small room, chewing on my thumbnail.

“It’s a good thing you put ice on it so quickly,” the emergency room nurse says, moving around to check Kai’s vitals. I’d had the wherewithal to get a small bag of ice from a street vendor as we were leaving the rink. “The doctor will come see you in a minute and determine if you need X-rays.”

Kai nods, but his eyes soften when he sees my face. I must look as scared as I feel.

He opens his mouth to say something when there's a knock on the door and Shay enters. Her eyes brush over me and Winnie before she rushes toward her son, her hands reaching for his face. “Oh, gosh, Kai-bear, are you okay?” Her lips quiver as she regards his wrist under the ice pack. “Is it just your wrist or are you hurt anywhere else, too?”

My breath skitters on each exhale with her questions.

I was supposed to keep him safe. I was supposed to show him he could have fun when he was with me. I was supposed to help relieve her fears of anything happening to him when she wasn’t around.

And I failed every step.

There’s another knock on the door before the doctor enters, taking us all in. Given how small the room is, and the fact that I’m having a hard time breathing, I clear my throat, speaking to Shay’s back. “Winnie and I will just get out of your hair.” I turn toward Winnie on one of the chairs. “Why don’t we sit outside for a bit until they’re done?”

She nods, and I note that Shay doesn’t even look over her shoulder to acknowledge my words. It’s almost as if I’m not there, but then again, I can’t hold that against her. She’s stressed and has more important things to deal with at the moment than my feelings.

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