Page 120 of Abyss

Left?

The revelation lands like a blow, and I clear my throat, gathering my composure. “Where did she go?”

The tightness in her stance loosens, her shoulders sagging, perhaps as she notes the concern in my face, my voice. Can she see the fissure forming inside my chest, too? “Portland. She left a couple of hours ago. Her flight should be landing in the next hour or so.”

The ground feels unsteady under my feet as the finality of her words register inside my brain. Anguish claws at my ribs as I release a breath, but keep everything I want to say—to ask—locked behind my lips.

She’s not the person I want any answers from; hell, she probably wouldn’t be able to answer my questions, anyway. And the only person who can didn’t feel the need to before she left.

“I see,” I reply, my voice hollow as I take a step back. Intruth, I don’t see at all, actually, but it’s about all I can muster up as a response.

I’m half-way to my truck when Kavi’s mother’s accented words have me freezing in my spot. “Fear is a bottomless pit, Mr. Case. No matter what you pour into it, it’ll demand more.”

My brows fold and I retrace my steps back to her, my curiosity piqued by her cryptic words. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

She swallows as if contemplating her next words. “Some people fear losing,” she shrugs, “it’s understandable, but did you know some even fear winning? Some fear the dark, but surprisingly, some fear the light, too. We all fear betrayal, don’t we? But I bet some of us fear the responsibility that comes with having someone’s trust, too. It’s a never ending list, to be honest, but do you know the only thing really worth being fearful of, Mr. Case?”

I stand silent and still under the depth of her gaze and the weight of her words.

“Finding love,” she continues. “Or a connection so deep that it reshapes your priorities. Finding a person who accepts your flaws, yet pushes you to grow. Someone who understands you in a way that no one else has, who breaches your defenses and grabs a hold of your heart, despite your efforts to shield it. Finding that someone who becomes the sunshine on your gloomiest days, the center of your world amidst the chaos.” She nods, as if she’s seeing something well past her words. “Because when you find that kind of love, you also find the greatest fear of all . . . the fear of losing it.”

Her words hit me like a relentless downpour, creating an ache so fucking excruciating, it threatens to suffocate me.

“My words weren’t just meant for you, Mr. Case. I said the exact same thing to Kavi before she left. You’ve been quite the beacon of light in her sometimes dim world. And thoughI don’t know exactly what led to her leaving so soon, I do know this . . . she no longer fears losing your love.” Her eyes dim, a cloud of melancholy settling over them. “Because she believes she never had it to begin with.”

It’sfascinating how little moments with someone become the only thing you crave when they’re gone.

The way her eyes trailed over me when I walked into a meeting.

The gentle glide of her thumbs over my scruff.

Her soft intake of breath when my lips grazed over her neck.

Each memory is like an agonizing echo, a reminder of what’s now out of reach.

It’s all I can do not to release the roar I feel rising inside me. A roar that would give way to the frustration and sorrow surrounding my insides.

If she only knew . . .

I’m still sitting in my parked truck an hour later, my head leaning against the warm leather headrest, while staring out into the darkened sky when my phone buzzes with an unusually long string of texts.

My heart leaps inside my chest before it plummets like a stone as my eyes wander over the words, each one like a dagger piercing through the fragile barrier that guards my heart.

Kavi

Hey, Hudson. Based on the several missed calls from you, I assume you’ve read my resignation and have realized I’ve left. I am sure you have questions about my abrupt departure and want to chat, but please respect my wishes for this to be our final communication.

Per your words, the terms were clear. This thing between us was never meant to be more than a fling, and I apologize for letting myself get carried away. Though I won’t apologize for falling for you, for loving you.

Somewhere in the middle of it all, I started believing in forever when, silly me, I should have known better than anyone that there is no such thing. There is only now, this moment, the present. Nothing else is guaranteed. It’s the actions we take in the present that matter, and so, I decided to take my present into my own hands and do what was best for me.

I want you to know that I don’t blame you. I should have known better and listened to the words you were saying rather than read between the lines for the ones you never did.

I have no regrets about our time together and I’ll cherish every moment we shared, but I couldn’t stay longer knowing it was going to end, anyway. Knowing my love wasn’t enough.

Goodbye, Hudson. I wish you nothing but the best. -Love, Kavi

I read her text again in complete shock, my heart shattering inside my chest, my world collapsing like a sandcastle swept away by a sudden wave.

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