Page 130 of Abyss

“Since the day you left that slice of cake on my desk,” he continues, taking another step forward, crossing a chasm I’m not prepared for him to cross. “To the day you threw a resignation in my face and sassed at me in the elevator, to the night we stood under your umbrella in the pouring rain."

I blink rapidly, hoping to trap my tears behind my lids but doing the opposite instead.

“I loved you the day you told me your dreams, to the day you shared your fears, your childhood, and your secrets. I loved you when you cried in my arms, and I loved you when you smiled under my touch. I’ve loved you in every goddamn moment, Kav, and I’ll continue to love you more with every new one, if you’ll let—”

“No.” I shake my head again, pulling the box to my chest as if he’s threatening to snatch it from me, all the while wanting to hurl it to the ground. “I heard you. I heard you tell Madison that we were temporary, that it was just a fling. I heard you say that it got out of hand, that we got out of hand.”

He nods. “I’m not denying what you heard. But, baby, you didn’t hear the best part. The part when I told her that, despite the fact that we started as something temporary, you’d become a permanent part of my heart. That it did get out of hand, but in the best of ways. That I couldn’t fathom not being with you, not then and not ever.”

I don’t move, don’t breathe.

Hudson watches my face, recognizing the doubt and disbelief set over my frown before he tilts his head to the box. “Don’t believe me? Look underneath the papers and you’ll find what you need. And if you don’t,” his jaw clenches, like he hasn’t considered an alternative until now, “then I’ll turn around and leave.”

My eyes drop to the box and the larger, folded papers underneath the small ones. I pull one out, unfolding it with one hand, and rest it over the open box to read.

It looks like some sort of leasing contract for an office space.

“Read the date,” Hudson demands softly, taking a step forward as slowly as one would when assessing an injured animal, so as to not alarm them.

Fresh tears find the corners of my eyes as I read the date—-almost two months ago. “Wh-what is this?”

Hudson steps closer, only a foot or two away from me. “Read the other one.”

I pull out the other paper with shaky hands, my eyes scanning the deed to a property in Portland, signed and dated a little over a month ago. Days before I left.

My chest heaves.

My heart skips.

“I’d been working on the move for well over a month before that.” He swallows, his throat bobbing under an unbuttoned collar.

“You . . .” I blink at him, my stomach feeling hollow. “You live here now?”

He nods. “I opened the Portland branch of Case Geo a couple of weeks ago.”

“But, what about . . .” I trail off, trying to collect my thoughts. “What about the ranch? What about the San Francisco office?”

He shrugs, hands still tucked into his pockets. “I decided they weren’t as important as the quitter I wanted to chase.” A smile dances on his lips. “They’ll always be there. Maddy and Brie are taking care of the ranch, and Jett took over managing the office.”

He gave the office to Jett?

He left his home, his ranch? He left Kansas?

My heart is in my throat, my voice a hoarse whisper. “You did that . . . for me?”

Hudson closes the distance between us, pulling the box from my hands and placing it on top of my car. Strong arms collect me as he slides his hands to my face, cupping my cheeks. “I’d do anything for you, Kav.Anything.”

A heated tear rolls down my cheek. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

He brushes my cheek with his thumb. “I had a plan to surprise you the night Maddy came over, but I realized later that I should have told you sooner—the moment I started the entire moving process. I fucked up, Kav. I fucked all of it up, and I’m so sorry. But,” eyes like cerulean windows mist with a mixture of anguish and hurt, the first crack in his intrepid facade, “you didn’t give me a chance to. You left before I could tell you anything.”

“So, you’ve been here for the past few weeks, but you’re just now coming to see me?”

I don’t mean to sound accusing since I’m the one who cut off our communication, but he changed his entire life and has been here all this time. Why wouldn't he find me sooner?

The corner of his lip tips up. “It took me time to get everything settled here . . . time I didn’t want to share once I had you in my arms. And since you didn’t want me to contact you, I thought perhaps that time was something you needed, too. But I couldn’t wait any longer.”

My mouth drops open in an effort to speak, but nothing comes out. How could it when everything seems to be clicking into place, and I’m realizing that I fucked up, too. That not only did I cause myself an entire month of heartache, but him, too. That, had I stayed and given him a chance to talk to me face-to-face, we could have saved each other from this anguish.

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