Page 117 of Pretend for Me

Name of the restaurant where we first ate together.(Answer: Sakura)

The meaning ofmeri jaanin English.(Answer: sweetheart)

The number of times I’ll tell you I love you.(Answer: infinite)

His smile grows with each clue and answer he reads, but it’s the last one that has a tear dropping from his pooled lids.

What you’ll be to me from this day forward.(Answer: husband)

God, my knees almost buckle at the sight of him as he looks up, eyes glistening as they connect with mine. There’s so much love and adoration there. And even though my entirebeing begs me to run to him, to let him gather me in his arms, I stand my ground, savoring the moment.

A moment I’d never imagined, but a moment that’s truly mine.

A man who’s truly mine.

And as Bono’s voice charges the air around us, I feel his words inside my bones.

It’s a beautiful day.

forty-one

piper

What Heartbreak Is

Two Months Later . . .

My hand rises to knock on their bedroom door, currently ajar, but halts when I hear Deepak’s murmured words. He’s speaking to his wife as she lays on her bed, his voice a broken whisper, filled with a lifetime of love.

“Claire, my love,” he whispers, his voice thick and raw. “God . . . I wish I could go with you.”

A throaty sob rumbles softly through his chest. “Please, sweetheart, take me with you. I can’t live without you. I can’t—” His forehead drops to her shoulder, his body quaking. “I can’t fathom a day without you. You’re my whole life.”

The teacup shakes in my hand, the tea I’d made for Claire almost spilling over the sides. The lump I usually have in my throat at the sight of my beautiful, nurturing mother-in-law doubles as I desperately hold back a sob. A curtain of hot tears blur my vision, pooling inside my lids.

I knew our time was coming to an end . . .

But I didn’t think it would be here already.

Not when we should have had so many more moments to share, to live.

“Deepak,”Claire says weakly, running her shaking fingers down the back of his head. “Love of my life.” She pauses, taking a labored breath. “Don’t make this harder for me than it already is. We’ll see each other again, sweetheart. I’ll be waiting for you, but I’ll be patient.”

“No.” Deepak shakes his head, his desperate plea begging for his fate to change.

“I have loved you,” Claire continues, her fingers still running through his hair, “since we met all those years ago at the museum in Santa Fe.” Her chest rattles with another breath. “Remember how we marveled at that painting of roses for so long?”

“It’s when I found out you loved them so much,” he murmurs, a ghost of a smile in his voice.

“And you sent me a bouquet of them for months until you finally convinced me to move to California.”

“Because I knew then what I knew every day with you . . .” He sniffs. “That I couldn’t live without you. Not a moment and not a lifetime.”

A strangled sound erupts from his throat, and I place a hand over my lips to muffle my own cry. I shouldn’t be here to witness such a private moment between them, but their love and heartbreak keeps me frozen in my spot, my heart both begging me to leave while urging me to stay.

Claire sighs, and I don’t have to see her face to know her cheeks are lined with tears. “I’ll give you all my lifetimes, Deepak Menon. Take them all. But I need you to live, to thrive, for our children. I know Dev has found Piper, but he still needs you. He still loves you. And Deena needs you more than ever to be both her mom and her dad.”

Deepak’s shoulders continue to shake as he reluctantly and heartbreakingly accepts his fate.

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