Page 80 of Sunday Morning

He shrugged. “As long as we can get away with it. The rest of the summer. Thanksgiving. Christmas.”

I chewed on the inside of my cheek.

“Why do you look so terrified?” he asked. “No one will find out. It’s not like we won’t see each other. I’m busy. You’re working. No one will suspect anything. It will be fine.”

I tried to nod and actually believe it. But everything wasn’t going to be fine. There were too many secrets—the really bad kind that could break up families.

“So this is it?” Suddenly, my heart recalled all the reasons I fell in love with Matt. And while Ididn’twant tomarry him or be his girlfriend any longer, the official decision to end things made my eyes burn with unexpected sadness.

“Don’t. It’s for the best.” Again, he squeezed my hand, but that only made it worse.

So I hugged him as the dam broke, and I bled with empathy and guilt. Part of me wished Isaac would not have come home. That was the version of myself that aimed to please, the version that was a chameleon, fitting into whatever anyone needed me to be.

But Isaac did come home, and I got a glimpse of my true self, and I couldn’t turn back.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

CYNDI LAUPER, “GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN”

“I need a huge favor,”I said to Heather the second she hopped into my car.

We were meeting a few friends for burgers and bowling two days after the rodeo.

“What?” she asked slowly with distrust in her eyes.

I wrinkled my nose. “I need you to let your parents think I’m camping with you and everyone else on the Fourth the way I’m letting my parents believe it.”

“Uh, what do you mean? You’re making it sound like you won’t be camping with us.”

“I won’t. And please don’t have a cow. I know we’ve been looking forward to this for weeks, but something has come up, and I can’t pass up the opportunity,” I said, backing onto her street.

“Just tell me. However, there’s nothing that will make itokay for you to miss this trip, short of death, but I’m totally listening.”

“I’m going to Nashville.”

“Not even!”

“Even.”

“With who?” she gasped.

I pressed my lips together for a beat. “Isaac.”

“Dude. No way. Why? How? Did he ask you? Are you in love with him? Tell me!”

I couldn’t hide my excitement as I gripped the steering wheel to keep my whole body from shaking. “The other night, when I went with Matt and his parents to the rodeo, I headed to the bathroom to get another Pepsi, and Isaac was sitting in his truck playing his guitar. He called me ‘gorgeous,’ and it sounded so hot. And the next thing I knew, he was inviting me to Nashville over the Fourth. Some guy he knows from the Army has a bar there, and Isaac’s going to perform. He said I’m not allowed to perform, but I’m going to change his mind.”

“Dude …” Heather shook her head. “That’s crazy. What if your parents find out? What if Matt finds out? And why didn’t you tell me this when we talked on the phone the other night? You only said that you and Matt weren’t going to keep having sex. You totally skipped this very important bit of information.”

I sighed, glancing in my rearview to switch lanes. “I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t know if I was going to do it. And I didn’t want you trying to persuade me one way or another. The decision has to be mine so that you don’t feel responsible if anything happens and I get in trouble.”

“Sarah, this is so wrong but so romantic. And I’m jealous!” She pinched my arm. “You’re such a hog. You can’thave all the good guys. If you don’t want Matt, can I have him?”

“Well,” I cringed and shrugged. “He’s unofficially available.”

Her eyes bugged out. “What?”

I nodded. “We parked in our spot to have sex, but I felt way too guilty, and the next thing I knew, we were breaking up.”