Page 5 of Reaching Roland

“No, I wanted a chance to move to a bigger, more open city and find true love.” He rolled his eyes in a way that looked like he was mocking himself, which I wasn’t thrilled with. Kenny was an amazing human who deserved what I’d had with my beloved Rhonda. “Moving here seemed like the best option for that back when I was all full of hope and cu?—”

He cut himself off, and I bit back a smile. If he wasn’t just a little older than my son, I’d tease him about being full of cum, but it didn’t seem appropriate, so I gave him a break and said, “I'm surprised you didn't go up to New York, then.”

He snickered. “I was brave, but not that fearless. I also wanted to be close enough to drive home easily whenever I wanted. I’m super close to my family, even if small-town living wasn’t for me.”

“So how is that quest for true love really going?”

He swirled the stubby brown brush he used in the soap. “I’ll tell you my short and depressing story of love-never-found, if you quit talking so I can lather you up.”

I nodded dutifully.

He huffed, then while moving on to the shave, my favorite part of my visit, he shared, “Well, I'm still as single as my friends are. It seems that making the big move didn't change my outcome any more than theirs. I've probably dated more than they have.”

He tilted his head, scrunching his face in thought. “Well, maybe. Joshua works in the business district, and he’s so private I don’t think any of us know what he really gets up to. But the only person from our small town who's had success with love is Will. You know who I’m talking about, right? He’s part of that whole crew of Daddies and boys that hang out with Cameron and Indie. John’s boy.”

I sifted through my Rolodex of names and faces of the men and women I’d met since I’d been spending more time at the tavern, and an adorable, completely irreverent young man with a partner who seemed to have an endless supply of patiencepopped into my mind, and I swallowed a chuckle so I wouldn’t end up with the creamy lather in my mouth.

Kenny held up the brush. “Ah, I see by the little laugh lines around your eyes that you know exactly who I’m talking about. I love that kid.” He snickered. “Okay, he’s a grown damn man now, but I’ll never forget the little boy he was. He reminded me so much of a little me when he was young. Anyway, around the time he made the big move to Takoda, I was ready to give up and go home. At least I’d be with my friends and family, right? But then his big romance with John started, and it buoyed my hope that I might still find that special someone, too, if I stopped being impatient and gave it more time.”

He snorted. “So much for that dream. They’ve been together at least eight years, and the only thing that’s changed for me is that I’ve made a life here for myself. I have a great job with a full book of customers, and my bosses and their people have become my found family. I really do have a blessed life, if you overlook the fact that every person I date has been a dud. That’s why I’ve decided to stay single. No more falling for straight or closeted men or jerks who think I’m only good enough to play around with. Nope, I’m going to enjoy this ride by myself.”

Hearing the tremor in his voice, I opened my eyes. He leaned down over me, shaving my face, the smell of grape from hisBlow Popwafting over me as he breathed. His words were big, but I saw the truth in every line of his face. Kenny was lonely. He had friends and family, both here and down the shore at the LBB, but what he didn’t have was that all-consuming passion, a place for him to direct all that unconditional love brimming over in his huge heart, and someone to cherish him, making him the center of their universe like he deserved. I’d have to talk to my kids andget their opinions because this man deserved happiness, and I was determined to help him find it.

“What’s on your mind,Roland? You’re a million miles away today,” Miss Georgina said as I tightened the final screw into place in her antique cuckoo clock. I’d noticed it hanging silently as I left on my last visit, so I’d asked her if she’d like me to attempt to fix it. I was pretty handy, if I did say so myself.

“All done.” I held up the ornate piece. It was shaped like a little brown cottage with a shingled roof and mill wheel that turned under the front porch. Three miniature people in old-timey wear rotated in and out of view off of the balcony, and a shepherd boy stood at the bottom of the steps into the house with a staff in hand and a sheep at his side. The little bird popped out at the top of every hour, giving the classiccuckoosound.

She clapped her dainty hands together, squealing gleefully. “Oh, Roland. You didn’t have to fix that ol’ thing, but I’m so happy that you did.”

Hanging it back up in its place of honor on the wall, I looked at her over my shoulder. “I know I didn’t, but I know what a kick you get out of this clock. I’m not sure you realize it, but no matter what you’re doing, you smile softly every time the little bird does its thing.”

Her gaze roamed the room, scanning her surroundings fondly. “When I downsized into this place, I only brought my finest treasures. Things that held my memories within them. Items that brought me joy.” She tipped her head toward the now re-hung clock as I made my way to the loveseat next to the peachand cream floralQueen Annechair I’d reupholstered for her last fall. “That clock hung in my grandfather’s study when I was a little girl. I’d play at his feet behind his desk, popping up whenever the cuckoo chimed to watch the bird emerge from its hidey-hole.”

She sniffed delicately. “He left it for me when he passed away, but I didn’t know. My mom kept it a secret until I owned my first home, surprising me with it at my housewarming party. Oh, how I cried. It felt like he’d joined the celebration. It’s hung in a place of honor ever since.” Her gaze, damp with moisture, moved to mine, and she clasped both hands over her heart. “And it’s kept him here. Gone but never forgotten.”

My heart twinged as I pictured all of the things in my house that held the essence of Rhonda. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever be able to find the courage to downsize. To lose pieces of the things she’d held dear would be like cutting out chunks of my own heart. Leaning forward, I settled my hand on her knee. “And that’s why it was important for me to fix it for you, Miss Georgina.”

She sniffed again, but this time with exasperation. “For Heaven’s sake, Roland. Call me Georgina or George or Gina. I’ve gone by all three, so you chose. Miss Georgina sounds so formal.”

Grasping one of her hands in mine, I leaned down and brushed a kiss across the paper-soft skin. “It’s the proper level of respect to show the matriarch of this little family we’ve found.”

She giggled and fanned herself with her other hand. “You’re such a sweet talker.” She turned her hand in mine and held it fast. “You spend too much time helping me and these other old geezers around here out. Don’t get me wrong, we appreciate it, but you’re still young?—”

I snorted, earning a narrow-eyed glare. “Don’t get me started, Roland. I know you think you’ve got one foot in the grave, but until you’re as ancient as me, you’re not entitled to consider yourself old yet. You still have a lot more life left in you. Cameron’s got Indie, so you don’t have to worry about him anymore. It’s time to chase your own happiness.”

Tugging carefully, I pulled my hand out of her gentle grip and rubbed the back of my neck. “Miss Georgina, I am happy.”

She reached into the crease of her chair and emerged with her Victorian-patterned hand-fan, whipped it open smartly, and fluttered it in the air near her face. She really was a stately old gal. “You’re not. You’re merely existing. You don’t even have that friend group of yours anymore. I know why, and I don’t blame you. With Indie’s distasteful father being a part of them and knowing what you know now, the only way to maintain the rest of those relationships would’ve been to tell them all what you found out about him kicking his own son out for being gay and lying about him stealing money and running away from home, which you can’t do.”

“No, I can’t.” As much as I wanted to label Indie’s father, Bartholomew Sr., for the deceitful, conniving, piece-of-shit that he was, I wouldn’t betray Indie’s trust. When I found out last year what his father had done, abandoning him, putting him out on the streets, shutting off his cell phone so none of us could reach him, and convincing Indie that we’d believe his lies over the sweet and sensitive boy I’d known since birth, I’d been furious. My instincts had been to hunt Bart down and rip his arms off and shove them up his ass. I’d never wanted to inflict such violence on anyone in my life. Hell, I’d never actually wanted to physically assault anyone before.

But Indie had been adamant that Cameron and I let it go. My friend group had existed since high school, and I’d known Bart the best since his wife, Nadine, and mine had been the best of friends since childhood. Several years after I lost Rhonda, Bart lost Nadine too, so we’d spent even more time together. I’d always worried, though. I’d known how terrible Bart could be, and leaving Indie with only his jackass of a father had never sat right. He’d had me, too, and I’d never believed how his father had demonized him, but Indie had been a young, scared, high school graduate who’d believed his father that he’d make it so that he’d have no one to turn to. So instead of exposing Bart for who he was, I’d canceled game nights at my house and withdrawn. Thankfully, unbeknownst to Bart, Miss Georgina had been there for Indie, keeping an eye on him, and I would never be able to repay her.

“You know I’ve always loved Indie like a son, almost as much as Cameron. Those boys are my life. And I have you. And I’ve gotten pretty tight with your neighbors,” I teased.

She frowned. “Acting like you’re the on-call handyman of a senior living housing development isn’t exactly living the high life, Roland. Especially since you don’t get paid for any of it.”

“Come on, Miss Georgina. I get paid in pastries and homemade scarves and hats.”