Page 87 of Bitter Confessions

“You did, but I needed it.”

He wrapped both arms around her and buried his face against her shoulder.

“I should have stopped.”

The regret in his tone made her brow furrow.

“If you stopped, I wouldn’t be on cloud nine right now.” Her tone was deliberately blasé. He just gave her one of the most eye-opening, liberating experiences of her life and was ruining it by having an attack of guilty conscience.

“I can’t allow myself to get to a point where nothing you say will stop me. I’m so disciplined in every area of my life except when it comes to you. I have no limits, no control. I’m capable of anything.”

Sensing his genuine distress, she stroked his thigh. “I’m fine, Roth.”

“This time, you are, but next time…”

“We aren’t new lovers. We know each other’s preferences and what we can or can’t handle. You know I like it rough—brutal, sometimes. So do you. You know I like to be dominated, to be forced. I need to fight, and I needed you to fight for me. We both won.”

His hands slid over her body, slippery from the bath oil. “I like when you give in to me, but I like it more when you put up a fight and need to be tamed.” He sighed. “But it’s dangerous. I never know what I—or you—will do.”

“I trust you.”

“You shouldn’t.”

She opened her mouth to contradict him, but his next words wiped everything else from her mind.

“Ariana’s right to keep her children away from me.”

She sat up so fast, water sloshed over the side of the tub. When she tried to turn, the arm around her tightened so she couldn’t see his face. The lights in the bathroom were on the lowest setting so she wouldn’t be able to see much anyway, but…

“How the hell do you know that?” she shouted, talking with her hands and splashing water everywhere. “Damn it, Roth! Stop listening to my phone calls!”

“You defended me.”

“Of course I did! You wouldn’t harm a child.”

“How do you know?”

She went very still. “You would?”

“My mother calls me a monster. Your father blackmailed me. Look what I just did to you. You’d trust me with a kid?”

“Yes!”

“Why?” He sounded genuinely baffled.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Why did you come to Colorado when Kaia was in the hospital?”

Tension invaded his muscles. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“Everything. You’re estranged from your mother, haven’t seen her in years, yet when she was in need, you came. Why?”

“That has nothing to do with your sister thinking I’d take my temper out on a child.”

“It shows you have a code. Even though your mom made your childhood hell, you hired a nurse to care for her while she recovered. That doesn’t sound like a monster to me.”

It was one of the many contradictions surrounding him, but it proved that he wasn’t completely devoid of empathy as his mother thought. He provided for Kaia during her time of need and maintained some loyalty to her, even though his mother didn’t return the sentiment. It was an observation that comforted her, even as it drove her up the wall with frustration and curiosity.

“You won’t tell me Lyle’s secret because he supported me, and I’d stake my life on the fact you’d shield my niece and nephew even though you don’t care for their parents, because they’re innocent.” She made a flicking motion with her hand, causing dozens of droplets to disturb the water. “Besides, you’re scared to death of them.”

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