Page 115 of That Last Secret

She gasps, her hand flying to her chest.

“I-I’m so sorry.”

“Losing him the way I did and being as young as I was changed me in a lot of ways I wasn’t ready for. Growing up, I swore I would do whatever it took to follow in his footsteps and become a cop,” I continue. “Putting my job first before anything and anyone. Mostly out of fear of putting someone I care so much about in the same situation my mom and I were left in.”

Emiline only stares at me, void of expression on her face.

“Which is why I said Ican’tdo relationships, Emiline. I’m fucking terrified of something happening to me. Leaving you the way my dad left us,” I choke out the last words.

Her hands fly to my face. She pauses, scanning my features before she throws her arms around my neck, pulling me in for a hug. This feels good. Letting it out with her and feeling her comfort me the way she is.

I hate her knowing this.

I hate her seeing me like this.

“You don’t have to be afraid with me,” she whispers against the shell of my ear.

I finally wrap my arms around her, holding her tighter than I ever have before. Afraid that if I let go, she’s going to slip through my fingers.

“Yes, I do.”

She pulls her head back.

“You scare the shit out of me, Em. More than my job does. More than the future does. You were the curveball thrown into my life. You have derailed my plans and made me want new things to the point I question whether I even want this position anymore.”

“You deserve that position.”

“I do,” I agree. “But I’m not so sure I deserve you.”

She shakes her head, pulling away from me again, which only irritates me.

I fight her by pulling her back into me. “But I want to. I want to be good enough for you.”

“You are. Logan, don’t you see that? You’ve been the one to pull me out of my deepest days. You’ve been my person from the moment you learned all the weakest parts of me and you still stuck around.”

My head falls to her shoulder. This time, I allow the tears to fall. I allow everything I’ve always held back to come to the surface.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I say against her skin.

“Good. Neither am I.”

For the first time in a long time, I let someone hold me.

And fuck, it feels good.

I finally meetup with Avery and Macey for a late lunch.

Avery and I get a seat at the table while we wait for Macey because she worked the afternoon shift today.

“You look exhausted,” Avery says to me.

“I am.”

“You’re on spring break, right?”

“Yes. God, not having to go to lectures this week is such a relief. I’ve never been more ready for graduation.”

“Almost there, girlfriend. I can’t wait to watch you cross that stage at graduation. I’ll probably be the loudest one there screaming your name.” She laughs.

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