Page 132 of That Last Secret

“The plan was after graduation. I want to tell them. I want them to know and let this shit storm happen to get it over with. I don’t know how they will respond, but I need to get it off my chest.”

I’m tired of holding too many secrets from them.

After that speech he just gave, it physically pains me that I’ve been going behind their backs. Not telling them about mymental health struggles or that I’ve fallen head over heels for their best friend.

“You love him, don’t you?” Macey asks.

I can’t help but smile at that. The idea of loving him was never something I thought would happen. It’s not something I believed was in the cards for me. To have a man like him treat me the way he does.

I nod in response. “I think I do.”

“I love this so much,” Peyton says all giddy.

“Have you told him?” Avery asks.

I shake my head aggressively. “No. God, no. At the beginning, he told me he didn’t want a relationship. But over the last year, he wanted to see where this would lead us, and we would make a decision after I graduated. His actions show me that he wants this, but I’m terrified of finding out what he says back if I tell him.”

“You don’t want to rush him into anything.” Peyton shrugs. “That’s understandable.”

“But I really do—”

My words are cut short when all the guys come back to the table. Thomas, Marc, and Oliver laughing, and Logan faking one. I know it’s forced because I’ve seen him truly laugh before. I’ve seen him let himself go enough that the laughter is real.

“You really do what?” Oliver asks, coming down from whatever just had them in hysterics.

My eyes bounce to the girls and back to him. Silently looking for an excuse.

“She really doesn’t want to go to work tomorrow,” Macey answers to save me. “She doesn’t want to miss Mackenzie’s birthday party.”

I offer Macey a thankful smile but hate myself for the way she just jumped in and lied for me.

“We’ll save you some cake for the next day.” Oliver walks over to me, wrapping an arm around my shoulder. “We know you wouldn’t miss it otherwise.”

I give him a curt nod, my lips sealed as I look toward Logan. Once again, he’s not looking at me.

Two weeks ago, he showed up at my apartment with the most thoughtful graduation gift. Ending his birthday and the night with the best sex we’ve ever had. I don’t know how it’s possible for it to get better and better each time.

Since then, he’s stayed over a few times.

Not once giving me any inclination that things were off between us.

Why now?

Why today?

I can’t help but feel like he’s acting totally different like he’s pulling away from me.

My heart gallops behind my ribs while my mind runs rampant with doubts. Was I nothing more than a good time for him? Was I just something to help him pass the time?

On a date where we both talked about remaining hand in hand to tell my brothers the news, it seems like he’s already giving up on me.

The uneasiness never leaves me the entire rest of the night.

After dinner, I just wanted the night to be over so I could bring Logan back to my place and talk about what’s going on in his head. But the girls ordered drinks, shots, and dessert.

The night wasn’t ending soon, it seemed.

A few hours later, I finally excuse myself to use the restroom. Once inside, I lock the door behind me in the single-stall room and take a minute to gather myself.

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