Page 68 of Broken Ice, Mended Hearts

“We’re here for you anytime.” Stick reached across the table and bumped my fist. “Come to the house Saturday night. Cleevs and Eckie are coming, and so are Ty and Kev.”

“I’m not sure.”

“Not taking no for an answer,” he said. “Follow your captain’s orders.”

It always tickled me when he got fake-officious. “Yes, sir. I’ll be there.”

Chapter 19

Sven

I was a fucking disaster.Pip and I made it through training camp without nervous breakdowns because we were counting on our one day together in DC before the Cudas left on their first road trip. Being with him would be the medicine my soul craved, and having time to sit together and talk would be like heaven on earth. I won’t deny I needed sex more than I ever had in my goddamn life. It wasn’t just horniness, either; I needed the connection. Jerking off on the phone was better than nothing, but not by a lot. I couldn’t smell him, feel the warmth of his body, or experience the depth of his need.

Fate intervened with a force that made me wonder if Pip and I were doomed. The Cudas’ first game would be in Vancouver, and from there, they would go on to Seattle, San Jose, LA, and Anaheim. They’d been scheduled to arrive in Vancouver the day before they played to allow a night’s sleep before morning skate on game day. On the last fucking day of camp, though, Shuford got word that their morning skate wouldn’t be possible. Instead, their practice time in the arena had been changed to the afternoon before game day, so he decided they should travel aday earlier than previously planned. There went the day Pip and I would have had together. Our next opportunity wouldn’t be until nearly Thanksgiving, more than two months after the last time we’d seen each other.

When I got the news, I was so frustrated I went to the gym in Charlotte and worked out so hard I threw up. Another defenseman, Cal Bassett, was in the gym and helped me to the players’ suite so I could lie down. I tried to call Pip, but he didn’t answer, and I didn’t hear from him until two hours later. He texted to say they were having a grueling day, and all the Cudas were required to go to a VIP dinner in the evening. He and I wouldn’t be able to talk until after eleven.

That evening, I fell asleep waiting for his call and didn’t even hear the phone ring. A message was waiting on my phone when I woke at eight the next morning.

PIP: I hope you fell asleep instead of finding some hot guy to take the edge off with. LOL. I’m sorry about today. We’ll be leaving in the morning, but can I call you tomorrow night after we get to Vancouver? I miss you, big guy, more than ever.

There was also a voicemail. He’d tried to call at 6:30 a.m., and I still hadn’t heard the phone.Fuck me and this goddamn deal the Cudas and Congressmen have.I was physically worn out, but this emotional shit was about to kill me. As if things weren’t bad enough, he’d made another joke in his voice message about hoping I wasn’t shacked up with some guy. I knew he trusted me, but it was bothersome nonetheless. Yet I had to admit I’d be thinking similar things if the situation were reversed.

SVEN: There’s no other guy for me. I fell asleep and was so fucking tired I didn’t even hear the phone. I’m only awake now because some jerk started yelling in the room next door. I’ll be waiting for your call. Miss you so much.

I sat next to Drew on the plane back to DC. We were near the front, where the gamers sat, but neither of us was in the mood to play.

“Fucking Shuford, eh?” He smiled, but there was no happiness in it. “I needed a day with Cleevs. He’s pretty unhappy too.”

“I’ll bet. Pip was gutted.”

Drew shifted in his seat. “So are you.”

“Like you’re not.”

“We all are. Jack walked around with red eyes for an hour after we found out, but I think it’s probably hardest for you.”

I almost snapped that I wasn’t a fucking weakling, but the warmth in Drew’s eyes stopped me. “Why would you say that?” I asked.

“Because you and Gags are just getting started.”

“Shit. We don’t even know where the hell we’re going yet.”

“That’s why it’s harder for you.” Drew placed a hand on my arm. “Before Cleevs and I got married, he was in DC, and I was in fucking Chicago. We were both in the closet and missed each other so much there were days when I moved like a zombie. This year will be tough for you guys, a real test. I’ll be here for you any time.”

“Thanks. I’ll return the favor if I can.”

“Saturday’s not a game day. Benny Caldwell will be in town for the weekend, and Jack and I are playing golf with him. We need a fourth, so I’m drafting you. Afterward, you’ll all come over. We’ll hang out and playCall of Duty.”

Ordinarily, that would have sounded like a perfect day, but Pip was the only man I wanted to see. “Thanks, but I don’t know. I might need some alone time.”

“Don’t you have enough of that already? Remember, the Cudas are playing on Saturday afternoon. That’s early evening here, so we can talk to our guys after they get back to the hotel.”

He was right that I was already by myself too much, and as long as I was still able to talk to Pip, everything would be fine. “I’ll do it. Thanks for the invite.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? You’re spending the day playing golf with guys you’ve been with for weeks when you could be talking to me?”

Pip had never raised his voice to me before, so I forced myself to stay calm. “We’ll still talk on Saturday. Our tee time isn’t until eleven, so we can talk in the morning. Then we’ll talk again after your game.”

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