Page 31 of Hero for the Holidays

Fia’s face felt hot and her throat was scratchy.

“There’s nothing to do here,” said Fia. “We made our own fun.” That was minimizing. They’d rescued each other. That was how she’d felt at the time. She’d felt so oppressed by her house back then. Like she was going to burst out of her skin, and there was no one to listen to her, no one to care. She’d had to listen to her mother’s woes, bear the brunt of her anger. She’d had to keep her father’s secrets.

Landry had felt like an escape from all that. They’d created their own world together. Even the anger had been exhilarating in a way. He’d been hers. She’d hoarded him like he was a shiny gem only she knew about. At home she’d worried about her parents, worried about her sisters. With him...they’d been the only thing.

And then it had become clear the real world could break in. Could collapse what they were.

That they were still teenagers. Still human. Still frail.

And the idea that she was going to be a mother. Amother. It had filled her with dread.

“So you’ve been mad at him this whole time because you guys had sex when you were teenagers?” Alaina asked.

“No. I have not,” she snapped. “Regrettably for Landry, not evenhispenis isthatgreat.” She wished that she hadn’t said it that way. She regretted it deeply. It made her think about things that didn’t belong in this moment.

Landry King’s penis. Good. Lord.

No.

Restart.

“Okay,” said Quinn.

“It’s...” She had just faced her child down. Why was this so hard?

Well. Because it was going to take the way her sisters saw her and change it forever. Lila already knew that she was adopted. Landry already knew that she had given her baby up. Everyone that knew so far, had already known.

Her sisters thought of her as a certain person. She could already see the way that they were shaken by the revelation that she’d lost her virginity at fifteen. The rest of this was going to be...difficult.

So she just decided to jump in. To rip off the Band-Aid. Some other cliché. It just needed to be done. Needed to be said.

“I got pregnant. Because that’s the problem with being a kid having sex. You don’t always behave responsibly.”

“Fia,” said Alaina. “Oh my gosh.”

“I know. And... Do you remember when Mom and I had that fight, and then I left? I was gone for a long time.”

“Yeah.” Quinn frowned. “Mom downplayed it. She said you were just going to stay with a friend for a while. Did you fight about being pregnant?”

“No. She never knew.”

They’d fought. Fia had yelled at her for being a terrible mother who didn’t care about her children. Because she’d just felt failed. Profoundly. Seven months pregnant and terrified. She’d needed Landry because her mother wasn’t there for her, and then she’d felt like she’d had no one. Because Landry didn’t support her decision. Because her father was sneaking around with another woman, and Fia had known, and her mother had been stressed and suspicious.

And Fia had...

Well, she’d broken the world.

He doesn’t love you, you know? Because you’re such a bitch.

Don’t speak to me like that.

Why not? He’s cheating. You know that, don’t you? Maybe we’d all rather have her than you.

Her mother had grabbed her by the hair.I hope you never have children because you have no idea how hard it is. You’d be a terrible mother.

Good thing I never plan on being one.

“I couldn’t hide the pregnancy anymore, and the fight was a great...reason. I ran away. For two months. When I came back, I wouldn’t tell Mom where I was. But you know, she didn’t really care.”

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