Page 15 of Fire in My Blood

He studies my face for what feels like minutes before he speaks. “I just wanted to inform you that there’s been an accident up the road. Head on crash. A big mess. It’s probably best if you take the scenic route home today.

“Oh.” My face splits in a relieved smile, but I hope he can’t see anything other than gratefulness on my face. “Thank you for telling me.”

Smiling back at me, he gives me a small nod. “Sure, no problem. The roads are slippery from the rain tonight, so take care.”

“Thank you, I will.” I wave as I drive off and head in the opposite direction of what I usually do.

My heart is still slamming against my chest, and I’m surprised he didn’t notice. Or perhaps he did, but he didn’t comment on it. I have to be more careful from now on.

Laughter suddenly bursts from my lips. It sounds a bit crazed, but it helps to settle my frayed nerves.

By the time I arrive home, I feel completely drained. The range of emotions I’ve gone through tonight has left my body completely depleted of energy. All I want to do is sleep, and after a quick sandwich, I head off to bed.

But sleep evades me. My mind is spinning with thoughts of Lucas and the mind-blowing kiss we shared. Perhaps my recollection is inaccurate, but I can’t remember ever having been kissed like that. The feel of his soft but insistent lips, and his tongue playing with mine and setting my body on fire.

I abruptly sit up. He touched and kissed me, and I touched and kissed him right back. No fear, no tensing up, no pulling away in panic. I simply forgot about everything else and only focused on him. Perhaps I’m finally starting to put the assault behind me.

I shake my head slowly. No, it’s not that simple. Even though I haven’t tested it, I already know this doesn’t apply to men in general. It’s all Lucas and how I feel about him. If any other man were to try the same, nausea would rise in my throat, and my body would turn rigid from fear.

Lying back down, I stare up at the ceiling. Lucas is special. And it’s not just the fact that he’s gorgeous. It’s more than that. He makes me feel safe like I haven’t in a long time. And it’s mostly due to his genuine concern and understanding, and the disturbing yet amazing fact that I know he would kill for me without hesitation.

Even his kiss told of his accurate insight into what I’ve been through and how it affects me. He never grabbed me or held me in place. Instead, he brushed his lips gently over mine and left the control of the kiss up to me. It allowed me to open up to my attraction to him and explore it without fear of what might happen next.

A sense of peace fills my body. Perhaps there’s a future for me after all, a future that doesn’t consist of being alone. Perhaps I even have a chance at happiness. But it depends on me finding a way to help Lucas escape.

Chapter 10

Erica

I get up early as usual. Sleeping in doesn’t seem like anything I can do anymore. But then I like getting up bright and early to go for a run and work out. It calms me and gives me a sense of having accomplished something before the day really begins.

After my shower, I dress in jeans and a light-blue figure-hugging shirt. Breakfast consists of bacon, eggs, and fried tomatoes. Then I sit down with a cup of coffee and turn on the local news.

I don’t follow the news regularly. There are just too many horrible things happening, and I can’t surround myself with the knowledge of all that suffering every day. But every now and then, I try to update myself on what’s going on.

There was a murder last night in Queens where I used to live. A young woman was raped and killed, and the police don’t have any leads on the killer. They encourage everyone who noticed something out of the ordinary or was in the area last night to contact the police. Footage of the alley where the murder happened flashes across the screen, the police tape sealing off the area vibrating in the wind.

My body goes rigid, and my stomach rolls. I know that alley. I haven’t been back there since my assault, but I’ll never forget that brick wall. Not even if I live for a million years.

Is it a coincidence that the murder happened in that particular place? It must be. It’s been four years since my attack, so why should this incident have anything to do with whathappened to me? But it still brings it all back. All the horrid details I’ve worked so hard to forget.

I turn off the TV and shoot up from the couch before storming into the kitchen. What happened to me back then is threatening to take over my mind, and if I want to prevent that from happening, I need to focus on something else. Immediately.

I plug my phone into the speakers set up in my kitchen and crank up some music. While singing along, I take the cake base I made yesterday out of the fridge. I slice it horizontally into three layers before finding the ingredients for my special chocolate filling.

Intrusive memories of what happened four years ago try to invade my mind, but I push them away while I immerse myself in the lyrics.

As soon as the cake is ready, I put it in the fridge to let the chocolate set before I launch into cleaning the kitchen. By the time I’m done, it’s practically sparkling, and it’s time for me to leave.

I look forward to spending time with my niece and nephew. It’s always a treat to be surrounded by their excited chatter and watch their happy faces as they try to impress me with everything they’ve learned and created since the last time I saw them.

∞∞∞

“Auntie, Auntie.” Nigel and Nadine come running and almost knock me to the floor in their eagerness to welcome me into the house.

I laugh and hug them both.

“Come.” They pull me into the living room, and I barely have time to say hello to David and Mina on the way there.