Page 89 of The Wedding Engagement

He nodded. “No problem.”

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She’d been sitting there fora while, staring into space while Arran painted, before it occurred to her that since they’d arrived home and he’d fixed them something to eat, he still hadn’t pressed her to divulge how she was feeling. A refreshing change from her family’s constant requests to know the answer to that question. Especially since she knew that she was required to censor her answer, in order not to be too negative or assertive or whatever else. Well, that was what her mum required anyway.

Maya had texted asking the same thing, and Liv had replied withI’m fine, I’ll speak to you and Elise about it tomorrow at the tearoom x.

“Thank you,” she told Arran.

He shifted his gaze from the canvas. “What for?”

She took a breath. “For coming with me to Mum’s. For being there for me.” She smiled weakly. “For not pestering me about my feelings like everyone else did.”

Arran returned her expression. “Anytime.” He lifted his brush to the canvas again. “By the way, you were spot on when you dubbed him Douchebag Dave.”

She managed a soft laugh. “Right? I think we need to change his name by deed poll.”

The sound of his chuckle soothed her ragged nerves. It was like warm honey, the same as his eyes.

“I really wanted to punch him in the face, though,” Arran said, his voice tight despite the recent chuckle.

“I know you did.”

He shot her a soft look over the top of the canvas.

They settled into comfortable silence again as he recommenced painting. Liv shifted a little on the couch, noticing that her left kneewas tender. She rolled up her jeans to reveal a big purple bruise on her kneecap. It must’ve been acquired during that rugby tackle.

She tried to roll it back down before Arran saw, but she wasn’t quick enough.

“Oof, that looks sore,” he said, doing a double take.

Liv hurriedly covered it up. “It’s okay. Not that painful.”

Arran held her gaze for a moment. “Your knee, or the situation?”

The instinct to put on a front surfaced. But she was so sick and tired of hiding. Plus, the pull to confide in him was too great after he’d been there for her during Dave’s barrage of toxic messages and after his steady, comforting presence this evening. “Both, to be honest.” She took a deep breath, overwhelmed by her emotions. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” he said, leaning his forearms on his knees.

Her pulse gathered pace. “What does it mean that I don’t feel anything about attacking my dad?”

He met her eyes steadily, as if willing her to continue.

The all-too-familiar sickening feeling swelled in her stomach. “I slammed my father onto the ground. I hurt him. And when I realized I’d hurt him, I didn’t care. I just hurt him some more.” She paused to search his face. “And still, I don’t care.”

Arran clattered his brush onto the desk, leaving his chair to come and sit with her. “I think it means you have closure.” He took her hand. “Why? What do you think it means?”

Tightness swelled in her throat, and for a moment she couldn’t squeeze her voice out. “I, ah…” She took a breath, and during the pregnant pause that followed, she tried to formulate the jumbled thoughts in her mind into some sort of coherent sentence. Surely translating her thoughts and feelings into words shouldn’t be this hard. But she’d never tried before, not when it came to this.

He didn’t hurry her, but held her hand gently while she battled to find her words. “What if it means, deep down, that I’m…a bitlike him?” Her voice broke as she uttered the last syllable, tears spilling out onto her face. Tears that she felt she’d been holding in all her life.

Arran brought her closer, lifting a hand to wipe the moisture from her cheeks. “Sweetheart. Why on earth would you think you’re anything like him?”

Her breathing felt shaky. “When we were growing up, everyone would go on about how Sam was the spit of Mum and I was Dad’s double.”

“That’s only appearance, Liv,” he said gently. “It’s just DNA. Nothing else.”

Her palpitations increased, making her breathless. “But there’s more to it than that. DNA affects personality as well as looks.”

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