Page 27 of Lessons In Grey

Ash huffed as I eyed the pills. “The nerve of her. God, we should have left them in the dust a long time ago.”

“Excuse you?” Katelyn chided as I tracked Remi and herperfect, swinging ass on her way down the steps and towards the stage.

“Shut up, Katelyn,” Ash snapped.

Remi made her way to one set of stairs, Rags still deep in his work.

I shouldn’t be watching her. I shouldn’t be watching this. I should look away before I learned something about myself I wish I never had.

He was so entranced with his work that he never looked up. Not until Remi stopped beside him, grabbed his chin, and pulled it over.

His lips moved.

She smiled and leaned in until their lips touched.

“Em?”

“Oh my God,” Katelyn laughed.

There it was, that pain I hadn’t wanted to know about. Two and a half weeks was all it had taken for that man to get under my skin, and now I was suffering through this.

God, I was such a fucking idiot.

Remi’s lips moved slowly against his, her tongue flicking out to touch his lips.

I clenched my jaw, doing my best to keep my expression cool as she leaned back and gave him a soft smile, her lips moving in response.

He pulled away from her and turned back to his work, doing nothing to wipe away the shining gloss that now dusted his lips.

Remi straightened and looked up, her eyes finding mine, smirking.

I gave her my best ‘unimpressed’ look before turning back to my work. It meant nothing, this feeling inside of me. I didn’t care. I had known this entire time that they were whatever they were, so I had no right to feel this way. We had only had a few conversations, nothing more, nothing less.

“What thefuck?” Ash muttered in disbelief. “Fucking bitch.”

“Go, Remi,” Katelyn cheered quietly.

I shouldn’t have hated it as much as I did, but I did. That cracked soul of mine ached in a way it shouldn’t have. Goddammit.

~~~

I leaned back against the alcove, trying to focus on my words, but all I could see was Remi’s tongue sliding across his bottom lip.

I hated myself for it. I never wanted him in my life, and now here I was, hating her for licking him.

God, I felt like I was going to puke.

All of those talks, all of those gestures, they all meant nothing, yet there it was again, so very clear, replaying in my head over and over and over again.

Her tongue sliding over his lip.

It was like I was watching a five second movie and the remote was possessed, rewinding and replaying the same five seconds over and over and over again.

His cologne found my nose before his presence fell over me.

I tightened my grip around my pen, glancing up just high enough to see his perfect dark brown shoes before I turned back to my page, every muscle within me tensing. God. This had to have something to do with science. With our biological need to mate and reproduce. I was never going to have control over it, it was biology.

Somehow, that brought me very little relief.

---