Page 29 of Ethan's Sky

I see why Jayde thinks he’s hot.He is.With his dark messy hair and light facial scruff, he’s got the wholeVampire Diariesvibe about him. Too bad he’s a womanizing asshole. He’s a young, good-looking guy, who has patch pussy ready and available with no strings attached anytime he wants. It’s a perk to being a part of the MC. And a slap to the face to the women who genuinely love and pine for them, like Jayde.

“I’ll just head outside and sit on the rocker until Pres calls. If you need anything, holler.”

“Sure.”

The door clicks softly behind him, leaving me in a silent house.

I make my way down the hall and into Daddy’s bedroom. Noticing the bed is unmade and his pajamas are folded over the rocking chair by the dresser, I grab his shirt and take a deep breath. It still smells like him. His spicy aftershave and a hint of clove.

For the first time, the pain in my chest becomes too much to bear. The reality of losing my father steels the breath from my lungs. The grief has been clawing at me, but I couldn’t bring myself to breakdown in front of them. Being in his room, surrounded by his things, it feels so permanent.

The tears break loose, and I let them.

The feeling of being lost and alone terrifies me.

Right now, alone in his room, wrapped in the comfort of his scent, I’ll let myself feel the weight of everything. Acknowledge the truth and embrace the pain and darkness being alone brings. I’ve felt it once before, and I promised myself never again. I’ll fight it off again.

After today.

It’s the only way I know to survive.

How am I going to do this without you?

I put the shirt on, curl up on the bed, burrow into his pillow, and let myself go. I cry until sleep finally takes me over.

6

ETHAN

With Skyler finally off the property and the whiskey finally doing its job, I’m feeling slightly more relaxed as we all pile into church. Gabe takes his place at the head of the table with Caleb and Ghost at his right and left side. Eli sits to the left of Caleb with Xander beside him. Cash and Walker stay standing leaning their backs against the wall, mirroring Mack and Declan who are standing behind me. Me, Jake, Jameson, and Hawk fill in the seats around the table.

The tension in the room is fucking palpable.

Ghost scrubs his face, looking like he hasn’t slept in days. He looks exhausted with a side of murderous looking over the top of his hand at Caleb, then back to Gabe. He’s fucked up over losing his brother, and I’m sure the way I handled the whole Skyler situation didn’t help matters for him. Knowing Ghost, he’ll squash his own emotional shit while in church, but he just might come after my ass after.

Not that I care. It’d be a good opportunity for both of us to blow off some pent-up aggression. But I doubt Gabe will let it happen. There are rules about fighting with a brother. It only happens in the cage and must be sanctioned by the club.

Hawk has a valid point. I could at least be empathetic. Help find his brother-in-law’s killer. It’s a regret I carry with me daily. Not being able to make the person responsible for Emily’s death pay. I can help Ghost settle his brother’s murder and send the motherfucker responsible on the fast track to hell. My brother deserves that much.

I’ll do my duty to settle the debt, but it doesn’t mean I won’t hold a grudge for Skyler being here. I may have lost my shit momentarily, but I can’t help believing everyone here wouldn’t have done the same if they felt blindsided by their past. We’ve all got our own demons we face. Skyler Sinclair is one of mine, and my brothers know it.

While I was fighting off a coronary at the sight of my past and the reminder of my sister’s gruesome death, Skyler seemed to be taking the news of her father’s passing well. She sobbed for a minute when Ghost hugged her, but like a switch, she shut it off. Where she used to be sensitive and soft, she seems to have learned to be hardened off.

Maybe because you verbally attacked her.

Or maybe she just doesn’t fucking care. She didn’t care enough to even show up when we buried Emily. She hasn’t been back to see her father in years. Maybe she couldn’t be bothered.

I have every right to be angry after everything she did. She fucking left taking everything I loved with her. She stole it all from me. From us. She shouldn’t have any right to be here. But I don’t make the rules. I swore an oath of loyalty to uphold them and to the men around this room. To always have my brother’s back.

But who has mine?

I drag my hand through my hair breathing through my frustration.

“Stop scowling.” Hawk nudges my arm.

“Fuck off.”

“Hey, man.” There’s concern in Hawk’s eyes. He’s probably worried I’m going to attack someone again. “You good?”

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