Page 3 of Ethan's Sky

“Hey, Butter Bean,” he greets, using my childhood nickname.

“Daddy, what’s happening?” I grab my bag and move to the dresser with my phone cradled on my shoulder listening. I’m praying he’s going to tell me this was a mistake, tell me everything is fine.

“I’m sorry, baby girl. I’m not going to make it home for our date this time. I’m afraid I’m stuck in traffic with no way out.”

What he’s really saying is, “I’m in trouble and there’s no way I’ll make it out.”He sounds both stressed and defeated.

“Was there an accident?”

Are you hurt?

“No sweetheart, but there’s a lot of cars and not much moving. I don’t see an alternate route either. I’m so sorry, Sky.”

He’s trapped with no way out.

“Can you call for help with directions?”

He knows what I’m really asking him is can he call the club, the cops, anybody who could help him.

“No. I’m afraid there’s no one available at the moment. I checked in, left a message, but I’m going to have to ride this one out.”

He contacted the club but he’s too far away. He’s alone in this.

“Fuck!Fuck!”I shout into the phone, pausing my packing momentarily to catch my breath. I squeeze the make-up bag full of cash I grabbed from the bottom drawer of my dresser before sticking it in my go-bag.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. Listen to me. I need you to calm down and listen, Sky. Can you do that? I’ve only got a few minutes here, Butter Bean.” His voice sounds almost desperate.

I take a few steps backward sitting on the end of my bed.

“Yeah, Daddy. I’m listening.” Tears are slowly streaming down my face. I know what this means. I know what he’s going to tell me. We’ve practiced this so many times so I would know exactly what to do if this call ever came in. We just hoped it never would.

“I need you to call your Uncle Chris and tell him I can’t make our movie date. Ask him if he’ll be there in my place. I promise I’ll do everything I can to get there, but I don’t want you to go alone if I can’t be there. Do you understand?”

I inhale and slowly release my breath.

He’s telling me to go to my Uncle Ghost; no one calls him by his given name anymore, but anyone listening could find out who he was talking about if Daddy used his road name. He wants me to go home to Oak Ridge, to the clubhouse, and hide there. He knows he’s not going to make it, and Ghost is the only family I have left on this earth. If I’m with him, I won’t have to face this shit alone.

It's what he thinks. I’m still going to be alone. Once my secrets come out, when the club learns the truth…whenhelearns the truth…my uncle will have to choose. Blood or the club. And I already know he will choose the club. It’s their oath. The club is his family now. Has been for years.

“Butter Bean? Sky? Did you hear me?” Daddy sounds frantic.

“I-I’m here. Sorry, Daddy. I understand. I’ll pack the snacks up and meet him at the theater as soon as I get done here. I wish you could be here too.” My voice cracks. I’m fighting like hell not to let him hear me breaking on the other end of the line. It’s got to be hard enough for him to do this. I won’t add my shit to his pile. I can be strong for a little while longer.

“I’m so sorry, Bean. I need you to know, if I could be there…if there was any way out of this mess, I would be right there for you. But I can’t. Not this time. I’m afraid I’ve taken the wrong turn off and gotten myself stuck in some shit I can’t get out of. But no matter what happens, you need to know I love you. So goddamn much. You and your mother are the best things to happen to me in this life and when I see her, I’m going to tell her how fucking proud I am of the woman you’ve become. And then we’re going to find a nice porch swing and a tall glass of sweet tea and enjoy the sunset together. But I promise, we’ll be keeping an eye on you. Don’t you ever forget.”

He's crying now. I can hear it in the crack of his voice. He knows he’s about to die. I don’t know how or why, but if he’s talking about seeing my mother, he’s accepted his fate. Because she’s been in Heaven since I was eight-years-old.

I let the tears fall freely. There’s no point in hiding it anymore. We both know this is the last time we’ll ever speak to each other.

“I love you, Daddy. So much.”

“I know, baby. I need to call your uncle and let him know you’re going to meet him. I don’t want to let go, but…” he chokes on the last word.

“I know. Daddy, do me a favor?”

“Anything.”

“Hug Mama and tell her I love her. Tell her…I’ll come visit as soon as I can. Both of you.” My voice hitches. “I’ll bring hydrangeas when I come. I know they’re her favorite.”

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