Page 98 of Ethan's Sky

“I probably shouldn’t ask this. The last time we were together was a few months before Emily passed away. I’m certain I already know this answer, but I need to hear it from you. Was it our baby, Sky?”

She nods, squeezing her eyes shut not looking at me. “I’m sorry, Ethan. The anger and guilt I feel toward myself is hardly bearable most days. I can’t deal with yours too.”

A sudden sense of dread furls low in my belly.

“What happened to the baby, Sunshine?” I push a stray strand of hair behind her ear, cradling her face, forcing her chin up, kissing her forehead. Sky’s eyes snap to mine, as my forehead comes to rest against hers. Her eyes glassy with unshed tears.

“Tell me. What happened? Where’s the baby now? Did you give it up?”

She shakes her head. She tries to speak, nothing comes out. I pull her closer and hold her while she cries.

“I feel like there’s something broken inside of me. I never cry like this. But since being here, I’ve been bogged down. With Daddy’s funeral, and being around you, all the memories, and now the shit with the Devils, I can’t seem to get a grip on my emotions.”

I don’t respond. She needs to let this shit out, and I’ll sit here and listen to every fucking word. Part of me ecstatic she’s finally confiding something in me.

I’ll take her pain. Hold her while she cries. And when the time comes, I’ll fight her demons if that’s what she needs from me.

Once she’s calmed down, she turns her body pushing her forehead into to my chest, not allowing me to see those beautiful, expressive eyes of hers. I allow her to hide from me, for now, resting my chin on her head.

“The baby didn’t make it,” she says softly. “I’m sorry, Ethan. I’m so sorry. I tried. I wasn’t strong enough. I couldn’t protect us both.” I hate how small and frail her voice sounds. I choke past the lump in my throat, knowing what I’m about to hear is going to tear my heart in two.

“Ethan,” Skyler looks up, her tear-filled violet eyes so full of shame. “I lost the baby.”

We’re both silent for a bit. I’m not sure what to say, how to comfort her. It’s a strange feeling. I can’t describe it. I don’t know if I should mourn the loss or be somewhat relieved, she didn’t raise a kid and hide a child away from me too. I know it probably makes me a colossal asshole, but like I said, I don’t know how to process the information.

Skyler was off in Mountain Heights running from I don’t know exactly what. I was here, hating the world because my heart wasn’t beating like it once did when things were perfect. Emily was gone. Skyler vanished. I probably would’ve been far worse off than I was had I known she left with my kid too.

But she didn’t. She was hiding out, dealing with the loss of her best friend, and the loss of our child…alone.

“You’re a selfish bastard and all you care about it how the situation affectedyou… a young woman who may have very well been running for her life.”Kieran’s words hit home.

I feel Skyler closing down beneath me. If I give her too much time to be in her head, she’ll shore up those walls I’ve been chipping away at. I can’t allow that to happen.

“Did Emily know? About the baby I mean.” I ask. Sky sniffle and nod against my chest.

“We were planning to surprise you. You know Emily, nothing was ever simple it had to be a grand gesture,” she chuckles, but sobers quickly. “We were going to tell you when you came home to visit for graduation. We had this whole plan, but…s-she died before…” Her voice trails off.

“Jesus, baby.” I pull her close. “I’m so sorry you had to go through it alone.”

“I-I wasn’t alone.” She starts to pull away from my hold, searching my face before she says, “Cash and Eli were with me.”

“Say what now?” She jumps to her feet, creating space between us. I follow, not letting her get too far out of reach. “Cash!Cash was there for you when you lostourbaby, and I didn’t even know you were pregnant. No one thought to tellme?”Hurt, anger, sorrow, all weigh heavy on my chest.

Overcome with emotion, Sky rushes to explain. Her eyes pleading with me, for what? Understanding? To not be angry? How could I not be?

“Cashwas there for you when I should’ve been. He seems toalwaysbe there, by your side,” I growl. “You’re. Not. His. Yet, he’s always there.”

“Ethan…” Skyler sighs, reaching for my hand. I take hold of hers, needing the connection. “I was staying in an apartment near their clubhouse. Cash was helping me get my things settled in the first night when I started bleeding through my clothes. Cash and Eli, they took me to the infirmary room and had their club doctor take care of me. The doctor called in a friend of his, she’s an O.B.G.Y.N. They called her to come help me since I couldn’t go to a hospital without answering questions about myself and I needed to stay off grid as much as possible.”

“… if you loved her so much, I can’t fathom why you’d be so upset to find out the very men who saved your sorry ass, were also protecting hers.”Again, Kieran’s words play through my mind, and make me take pause to reevaluate what she’s telling me. As pissed as I am about not being there for her, not understanding the full extent of what had her running in the first place, I should be grateful it was my brothers who saw to her every need.

“I’m glad they were there to help you. You weren’t alone. I wish it was me who was there to hold you through it, but I’m glad Cash was there.” Sky looks at me warily. “You don’t believe me?’

“You hate Cash. You’ve been a dick to him since we arrived.”

“Because he’s always with you. He protects you. Comforts you. Makes you laugh. You talk to him freely about everything. I’m supposed to be the one you go to for all those things, Sunshine. But it’s okay. I’m here now, and we’re going to fix this shit between us. Then you’ll see you can trust me to be those things for you again.”

“Ethan.” She starts then sputters, “I can’t do this right now. I can’t process what you’re saying. I don’t know what’s true and what’s not.”

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