Page 4 of Forever Home

“Yes.” I nod again. “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome. Now, where was I?” She ponders for a moment, her mouth opening and closing as she nods, finding her place in her thoughts. “Ah, yes. I know that you’re going to be okay because you have each other. You’re both very brave and very strong,” she says, her hand brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “And at the end of the day, you will both always have me.”

“Really?” I ask, feeling slightly unsure. Every time someone says I’ll always have them, they end up leaving. And I end up hurt all over again.

“Really, really. I’m not going anywhere. If I did, how would I be able to share these amazing blueberry muffins with you?”

The memory brings tears to my eyes as I finish scooping the last of the batter into the muffin trays. The soft trickle of tears flows down my cheeks as I choke back a sob and place the scoop back into the bowl. I was only ten when she made that promise to me, and over the years, I’d completely forgotten about it.

But now, it’s like the promise had been made just yesterday.

A promise that deep down I had known she couldn’t keep forever, but one that breaks me nonetheless. Especially since it’s just my mom and I. With my dad having died when I was little and then my grandmother, having Mrs. Kendall around made things easier. But now that she’s gone, it’s like my mom and I are alone in the world. With only the memories we share and the bakery my mom opened in honor of my father who always believed that she could do anything.

***

The day goes slower than I had expected it to, and by the time the bakery closes and my mother and I say goodbye, I am more than ready to head upstairs, take a shower, and crawl into my bed. Who gives a damn if it is only three-thirty. My heart is heavy with grief. The day’s topic since thebakery opened this morning had been Mrs. Kendall and her unfortunate passing.

As soon as I get upstairs and close my front door, I sink against it. Tears flow down my cheeks again, but this time because of the anger I kept inside me. Not anger that was directed at anyone in particular but at myself. Anger over the fact that I didn’t go to see her more often. That I didn’t thank her enough. That I didn’t tell her how much I loved her.

Holding the raw emotions burning inside me all day pushed me to the point of breaking. My stubborn disposition wouldn’t allow me to break in front of everyone I’d grown to know and consider family. Instead, it demanded that I be a comforting face before them.

That I carry on casual conversations and take random trips down memory lane. All of these things I did out of respect for my mother and the memory of Mrs. Kendall.

The soft ring of my cellphone in my pocket causes me to groan as I pull it out. Knox’s name crosses my screen. We’d always been close but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to talk to him yet.

Or anyone for that matter.

With a heavy sigh, I lift the phone to my ear, answering his call. “Hello?”

“Hey Madi…are you okay?”

Is he seriously asking me that right now?

“Uh, no—not really,” I mutter in reply as I kick off my shoes and step into my kitchen. “Though I don’t think anyone is, really.”

“True. Mrs. Kendall did so much for the community. I mean, think of all the help she has given to the kids at the schools since we graduated. I can’t believe she’s gone…”

You and me both, buddy.

“I know…but can we talk later? I just got done with work and I was going to jump in the shower.” As much as I love Knox and usually have no problem carrying on conversations with him for hours, I just don’t have the energy for it right now.

“You guys had the shop open today?” From his tone, I know he’s surprised, especially considering how close my mom and I were with Mrs. Kendall.

“Yeah, Mom really needed the distraction. Though, I’d have been happy staying closed.”

“I can understand that,” he says softly. “Look, I won’t keep you for long. I just wanted to let you know that Mrs. Kendall’s lawyer called me earlier today. She said that she needs all of us to get together for the reading of the will.”

I pause for a moment, trying to wrap my head around what he’s saying. “Reading of her will? Wait… Why didn’t she call me herself?”

“Well, I talk to the lawyer all the time because Dad and I are planning her remodel project. So, when everything happened, I just offered to call you guys myself. I felt it would be more personal…”

“Why is everything moving so fast?” I’m completely confused. “That stuff takes ages to happen, and she only died this morning. How is she already planning to do the reading of the will?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. I guess that’s just how Mrs. Kendall set it up?”

Leave it to Mrs. Kendall to be quick about things. Lord knows that when she was alive, she always wanted things done quickly and efficiently. There was no time for lollygagging or whatever she called it. “Okay then. Who is the we part?”

“I thought that would have been obvious.” He laughs. “All of six us.”

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