Page 61 of Embers

Anna was part of one of the other teams. She’s done fine, as far as I could tell, but she let down her guard too soon. She didn’t know the man would be coming through that door, and so she’s not prepared when he grabs her and puts a gun to her head.

He’s desperate. Far outnumbered. So it makes sense that he lands on taking a hostage as his only way out.

Anna’s scared. I can see that clearly, although she makes no sound and doesn’t crumple.

“Let her go,” Maria says, coming in through the front door. “If you kill her, there’s no way out of this for you.”

There’s already no way out. Maria will never let this man live—not after everything he’s done to hurt other people. But I suppose there’s a chance that he’ll believe her.

He doesn’t. “You’re gonna kill me either way. What do I have to lose?”

Maria keeps talking to him. Not because she thinks negotiating will accomplish anything but to give the rest of us time to react.

Anna glances toward me. I catch her eye. I incline my head toward the right, hoping she’ll understand. Then I move a hand up like I’m scratching my head. I count down on my fingers from three.

She’s watching me. She understands. I can see it in her eyes. And her hostage-taker is distracted by Maria.

When I get to one on my fingers, Anna pulls dramatically to the right, trying to free herself from the man’s grip.

He doesn’t let go, but it doesn’t matter. She’s ducked her head far enough away from his gun.

I shoot the man in the head.

That’s one of the things Cal taught me. Always go for the head so they’ll never have the chance to get up and shoot you back.

Anna makes a whimper of sound as she stumbles away from the fallen body.

“Nice,” Maria tells me. Then she eyes Anna up and down. “You good?”

“I’m good.” Anna’s pale skin looks even paler than normal, but she puts on a brave smile. I know she’s upset, but she’s not showing it.

“All right.” Maria glances around, her eyes resting on the women and boy in the corner. “You’re free now. We’ll help you get wherever you want to go.”

* * *

It takes several hours to tend to everyone and clear out the provisions in the bar. For this particular mission, Maria recruited help since she never likes to travel with vehicles. Mack, Olivia, and Grant have been following us in a pickup truck. They pack up the food and supplies we find in the bar, planning to distribute them to folks in the area. One of the women has family nearby, so they’ll take her home, but the others have nowhere to go. After some discussion, they decide to go with Grant and Olivia to the bunker community where there are plenty of extra rooms.

Having the others with us makes the wrap-up to this mission quicker than normal. By noon, we’re able to make camp in a clearing about a mile away. It’s a good position. On high ground and with a good view in all directions. Maria assigns guards and lets the rest of us do as we like until we set off again tomorrow morning.

We’ve been walking for two days to get here, so most of us are ready for a break. The others scatter for naps or downtime or socializing.

I, on the other hand, have no idea what to do.

Faith was right. I’ve been much better for the past couple of months ever since I joined up with Maria’s crew. I like the work we do. I’m good at it, and it accomplishes tangible results. Results that change lives for the better for a lot of people.

I also like the sense of community here. Feeling at home with other women, many of whom have gone through things far worse than I have.

I’ve worked through most of my anger and a lot of my grief. I’m doing better. A lot better. I almost feel free.

But I still hate having downtime like this. Days spent without a real job to do. I don’t want free time.

It gives me space to miss Cal.

I don’t want to miss him still. After all, it’s been over three months since he walked out on me. I shouldn’t still be hung up on him, wondering how he’s doing, yearning to see his face, to feel his big hand on my back, my cheek.

I should be stronger than this. I should either hate him or be able to dismiss him from my mind completely.

But I can’t. And afternoons like this are when the thoughts of him most bombard me.

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