Page 32 of Citadel

Breanna doesn’t complain or chide me. She waits until I wash up, change into a nightgown, and crawl under the covers. Then she says quietly, “You’re not getting ideas, are you?”

“Ideas?”

“About Cole.”

“What ideas?”

“You know what ideas. I can see that starry-eyed look on your face, and it worries me.”

“I’m not starry-eyed!”

“You kind of are. And it’s understandable, but please try to be careful. He’s been good to us, and he’s definitely not a monster. But he’s still a leaver, Del. He’s never going to stick around.”

I sigh. Swallow hard. “Maybe.”

“There’s no maybe about it. He’s not any different than he was three months ago. He’s going to be walking out of here pretty soon, and I don’t want you to be left with a broken heart.”

“I’m not going to have a broken heart!”

“Good. Because my number one advice about men is not to fall for a leaver.”

“I haven’t fallen for him.”

I don’t actually know if that’s true, but it’s safer if I believe it.

* * *

I lie awake for a couple of hours, trying not to toss and turn so I don’t wake Breanna up. She’s sound asleep beside me, but my mind just won’t settle.

Finally I slip out of bed like I did three months ago. Leave the room and walk down the hall to Cole’s room.

He answers the way he did that other time. “Del? What’s the matter?”

“Nothing. Sorry. I couldn’t sleep.”

His eyes slip down below my face, lingering on my chest. My nipples are tight again, visible beneath the thin cotton of the gown.

He’s noticing them. He’s definitely liking them.

I flush. Gulp. “Cole.”

“You shouldn’t be here,” he mutters, gruff and terse.

“Why not?”

“You know why not.” He shifts slightly from foot to foot. “Hands off, remember?”

I suck in a gasp and look back up at him. “Breanna said that. Not me. And it was months ago. Things have changed.”

“They haven’t changed that much. She was right.”

“Why was she right?”

“I already told you. I’m not like that. I don’t take advant—”

“I know you don’t. But why would you be taking advantage? I get that you won’t fuck if my life is in danger, but it’s not in danger here. I’m safe. I’ve been safe for three months. I don’t have to fuck you to stay alive right now. So maybe… maybe I want to.”

He inhales sharply and tilts his head down toward me. “Do you?”

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