Page 41 of Citadel

It feels like he’s trustworthy. Solid. Unbreakable. I’ve spent my life relying on my instincts to guide me, and it doesn’t make sense that they’d lead me so far astray with Cole.

Maybe that’s what hormones do to us.

I should have learned that lesson by now.

“Anyway, it’s done. Hopefully he won’t hang around here long. I’ve got some more work to do on the roof, but I’m not really in the mood right now. I’ll work on it more tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow is fine. Don’t try to work on it anymore today. I don’t like you climbing up on that roof even when you’re not dealing with emotional upheaval.”

“It’s not—”

She gives me a significant look that silences my objection. “Okay. It was a minor upheaval. But I’m fine.”

“Delaney Elizabeth Rogers.” She flashes the slight dimple on the left side of her mouth. “You’ve always been way better than fine. And one day people other than your big sister will realize that too.”

* * *

Cole is still in town that evening, but I do my best to avoid him. Breanna and I take the last two chairs at one of the communal dining tables, and he sits across the room with two of the elderly couples in town. From what I can see, they do a lot of talking, and he responds with very brief replies. But he’s not openly rude to them—which pleases me for no good reason.

More than once, I glance his way and catch him watching me. He doesn’t smile or gesture or otherwise acknowledge my existence.

He just watches me in that silent, broody way he has.

It’s really quite unnerving.

After one brief exchange of glances, I turn back to find Breanna arching her eyebrows at me.

“I didn’t mean to look at him,” I tell her softly.

“I know. It’s hard to help it when he does nothing but stare at you.”

“He doesn’t—”

“Why do you even try to argue? When have you ever known me to be clueless about men?”

“Never. You’ve never been clueless.”

“So why would you doubt me when I say the man is into you. He’s always been into you.”

My cheeks flush. I wish they wouldn’t, but that’s one thing I can’t control.

“But being into you doesn’t mean anything if he’s not going to stick around.”

“I know. I know he’ll never stick around. You don’t need to worry about that anymore. I just don’t really know why… why… he’d even be into me.”

She huffs out a soft laugh and shakes her head. “Well, for one you’ve always been way prettier than you realize. It doesn’t matter how you dress or what you do with your hair, a lot of guys are going to notice that.”

“I’ve never been as pretty as—”

“You don’t have to look like me to be pretty, and you know it. But beyond that, sometimes people just click. It’s chemistry. Pheromones. Something like that. Sometimes people click, and there’s no denying it. That’s always what it felt like to me—watching the two of you back then. Why do you think I was so off-putting to him?”

“I didn’t know. I guess I thought you were making things up.”

“I wasn’t. There’s something there. No sense in denying that. But chemistry is not enough to sustain a lifetime of partnership. It never was. And it doesn’t have a chance in what this world has become. There has to be something more, and it starts with committing tobe there. He’s never going to do that.”

For some reason, even though Breanna is saying nothing I don’t already know—that I haven’t rehearsed in my own mind over and over again—her no-nonsense words make me feel heavy. Kind of sad.

She must see something on my face. “Why don’t you come out on the run with me tomorrow?”

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