Page 89 of Sanctuary

I lift my head to check his face. Hope has sparked in my chest. “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. I don’t think I want another child. I loved Will and Hal. I’ll always love them. But I was a different person back then. The man I was back then wanted to be a father. The man I am now… doesn’t. Maybe it’s selfish. Or maybe it’s that weight you were talking about before, but I honestly don’t want to live in constant fear that something terrible will happen to another child of mine.” He takes a slightly shaky breath. “I don’t want it.”

I give him a wobbly smile. “Okay. Good.”

“What about you?”

“I don’t really want it either. I never have. It felt like I did all the parenting duties I could manage taking care of Del all those years. I know it wasn’t the same, but that’s how it felt to me. I’m so happy. Just with you. I don’t really want any more of… of that kind of weight on my shoulders. But I also hate for you to missout on anything that you might want just because my body won’t cooperate.”

“Your body is absolutely perfect for me. Exactly as it is.” He leans up to kiss me lightly. “That’s not to say if somehow it changes, I won’t adjust. I promise I’ll be fully devoted to our family, whatever it happens to look like. If we have a baby, I will love that baby, and I’ll gladly take on that weight of responsibility again. But I’m not… waiting for it.”

“Okay good. Me either.”

“And it’s nice not to always have to pull out, since I’m clearly not very good at it.”

I giggle at this and snuggle against his warm, lean body. “No, you’re not.”

“I’m good at other things.”

“Yes, you are. And we’re better at a lot of things together.”

“True. So what do you say, love? Do you want to be good together forever?”

“Yes.” I’m smiling against his chest. “Yes, I do."

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