Page 35 of Knocked up By the Mountain Man

Since Thomas ate a little earlier because he couldn’t wait, Abby and I take a seat at her breakfast bar to finish our food. We sit in silence, chewing for a while, both of us lost in our thoughts, presumably over the mess I’ve gotten myself into with Beau. Because it truly is a mess, a never ending mess that only seems to get worse with time.

“The way things happened...” Abby finally pipes up. “Was it like he forced himself on you? Because he’s your boss now, isn’t he? Or at the very least someone you’re contractually working for. It’s a bit weird, isn’t it? Plus, he’s that rich wealthy asshole now, isn’t he? The sort of man who might take advantage of any woman who crosses his path, like his father...”

“No, it wasn’t like that,” I immediately jump to Beau’s defense. “It was far more romantic than that.”

“Ah, I see.” Abby cocks her eyebrow at me. “So, it was romantic, huh? I see. So, feelings came back, did they?”

“I didn’t say that.” A heat burns in my cheeks as I realize she knows me better than I know myself. I can’t let words comeflying out of my mouth without thinking them through or I’ll give myself away. “I just meant...”

“It’s okay, you don’t need to worry.” Abby grins at me. “If there are still feelings there, you can’t help that.”

I know she’s right, but I don’t want to admit it out loud. As soon as I start talking about my feelings, they’ll be out there in the world and impossible for me to deny or take back. Especially from Abby.

“It doesn’t matter if I still have feelings,” I finally say glumly. “We can’t ever go back there. Like you said, he’s like his dad now...”

“But don’t you think that might be an act?”

I stare at my friend, confused as she shrugs and continues. “I mean, he was a mess when you left. Completely off the rails. He wasn’t the same person at all.”

My heart skips a beat. “What do you mean?”

“He fell apart, Clara. Really, he did. He started drinking a lot, got into fights, and was reckless with everything. He wasn’t the Beau you knew. It was like he lost a part of himself when you left. No one knew why he suddenly changed, but… well, I’m starting to get it.”

A lump forms in my throat as her words sink in. “I... I had no idea.”

“Of course you didn’t. You weren’t here to see it. But it makes sense now, doesn’t it? The way he’s been acting, trying to keep up this tough, unfeeling persona. Maybe it’s all a facade because he’s still hurting.”

I look down at my hands, feeling a wave of guilt wash over me. “I didn’t know I had that kind of impact on him.”

“Maybe he was in love with you.” Abby’s eyes widen and she sucks in a gasp of air. “Maybe he still is.”

I hold up my hands to stop her from talking because her words are too much. I can’t let them sink in and affect me.I’m already confused enough about the whole mess with Beau without making assumptions about love.

“Abby, you sound like you’re on Beau’s side now, like you want me to get back together with him or something.”

“I don’t think you should have to worry about getting back with him.” She shrugs. “But I don’t think you should shut down the idea completely either, especially if you’re both still into each other. I mean, three years is a long time to hold a candle for someone.”

“Which would be all well and good,” I shoot back with a thick ball of emotion lodging itself in my throat, “if I wasn’t keeping something particularly major from him.”

Abby’s eyebrows knit together in concern. “What do you mean, Clara? What are you keeping from him?”

I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of my secret pressing down on me.

This is it… the moment I’ve dreaded for so long.

But if anyone deserves to know, it’s Abby. She’s been by my side through everything.

“Thomas is his son,” I finally admit, my voice barely above a whisper.

Abby’s hand flies to her mouth, her eyes wide with disbelief. “Oh my God, Clara. I knew you two were hanging out, but I didn’t know you... you slept together. How did I not know this?”

“It was only once,” I admit, my voice trembling. “But it was enough.”

“Doesheknow?”

I shake my head, tears welling up in my eyes. “No, he doesn’t. I never told him.”

Abby’s concern deepens, her brow furrowing with worry. “Why didn’t you tell him, Clara? He deserves to know.”

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