Page 105 of Big Bad Wolfe

Zane didn’t say anything for a long time. The slow rise and fall of Casey’s chest indicated the child had succumbed to slumber.

Finally, Zane bent and tenderly kissed his sleeping son’s forehead. “He’s going to miss you too,” he whispered shakily. A single tear slid down his cheek and dropped into Casey’s silky hair.

Jillian stood unmoving, heart pounding as her tears flowed freely. She’d seen glimpses of Zane’s wicked humor, as well as the soft side he hid behind a stoic wall of hurt. Caring, protective, wryly humorous Zane was the man she was undeniably attracted to. The man she’d bonded with.

But here in front of her, his soul laid bare, was the tender warrior she loved with all her heart.

Chapter 17

Zane looked up, pulse thundering with suppressed emotion as Jillian approached him.

“We better get Casey to bed,” she murmured.

He turned aside and surreptitiously wiped his face on his shoulder. All he needed was for Jillian to catch him being a crybaby. Damn, he hadn’t cried since he was six, when he figured out Stoneheart’s punishments and mocking worsened at any sign of weakness.

Even when Trev died, Zane hadn’t shed tears. During the funeral, he’d kept his face expressionless, his feelings buried … while chewing the inside of his cheek into hamburger.

Tightening his muscles to disguise their trembling, he reluctantly raised the arm encircling Casey, and Jillian scooped up the child.

Letting go of his sleeping son tore his guts out. And soon, he was going to have to let go for good.

Holding Casey close, Jillian rocked him with the natural sway women seemed to instinctively use with children. No one had ever held Zane so safely. So closely. So comfortingly. He’d never known the feeling of being held securely in someone’s arms.

His chest ached with longing for Jillian’s loving embrace.

Terrified by the ambush of unsettling vulnerability, he looked away and stared at the stars with fierce concentration.Reality check.

“Zane, want to help me play Tooth Fairy?”

Every bittersweet moment had become precious. An opportunity to stash away memories to sustain him when he returned to his solitary existence. “What do you want me to do?”

“Carry him to bed for me while I get the money.”

Zane rose from the chaise and she transferred Casey back into his arms. He smelled clean from his recent bath, the innocent, powdery scent of babies and young children. “I can’t believe the way he zonks out.”

“He plays hard and sleeps equally as hard. And he missed his nap today, which contributed to some of the misbehavior at dinner.”

“Aw crap, I forgot his nap, too.”

“Don’t worry about it, you’re doing very well.” She winked at him. “For a rookie.”

He carried the child upstairs and tucked him into bed. Jillian tiptoed into the room and placed a glittering coin on the nightstand. He stared at the shimmery silver. “What’s that?”

She grinned. “Magic fairy money. It’s a dollar coin coated with fine craft glitter. I’ve had it ready for a couple weeks.”

Magic currency. Now he’d seen everything. But he wasn’t surprised. Jillian created magic wherever she went. His son was blessed to have her for a mother.

And although Jillian was Zane’s spouse in name, she could never fully be his wife.

Pain and grief graveled his voice. “When I was a kid, my pals got a quarter.”

She slipped the note from beneath Casey’s pillow, glancing at Zane as they walked out into the hallway. “He gets a dollar for the first tooth, because it’s special. He’ll get a quarter for the rest. Glittery, of course.” She carefully shut the door. “Your pals got quarters? What about you?”

He’d received warnings from Stoneheart about wasting his time on useless fantasies. “My parents weren’t believers.”

The compassion in her eyes made him turn aside. He couldn’t afford to let her soothe his aching soul. He had to stay tough. Manage on his own. Like always.

She touched his shoulder and he couldn’t keep from tensing. She patted him. “You’ve had a really rough day.”