Page 157 of Please Hate Me

“What’s so funny?” Lucian asked, and something about the serious look on his face made me laugh even harder.

I was well aware of the attention I was commanding, but for the first time in forever, I didn’t care. There was no little voice in my head telling me to chop myself into more palatable chunks. All I wanted to do was exist in this beautiful moment that lingered somewhere between past and present.

“I was thinking about when Heather threw a pillow at you.” I giggled, taking a few breaths to compose myself enough to mimic Heather’s raspy New England accent:

“Lucian Castillo, how many times do we have to tell you that you’re not allowed to sleep with the girls?”

Sophia’s laughter mingled with mine. “Oh my god! I forgot about that.”

Tears gathered in the corner of her eyes, and she wiped them away with the back of her hand before placing it on my shoulder. Our lingering chuckles subsided as she made eye contact with me. The room seemed to fall away, and all that existed was Sophia.

Slowly, she leaned in and pressed her lips to mine. She was sweet, and this kiss felt long overdue.

She wrapped her arms around my shoulders, flicking her tongue across my lower lip as she kissed me again. I thought for sure Lucian was going to have to remind her of rule two, but after the second kiss, she pulled away, leaving her forehead lingering on mine. We sat there in silence for a moment, breathing each other in.

“I’m so glad you’re home,” she whispered.

My heart swelled to the point it was hard to breathe. Both she and Lucian had said that exact thing to me, so it must be true. That was it—I was going to cry like a baby and make an absolutefool of myself if I didn’t let out some of the emotions threatening to drown me.

“I still love you,” I choked, just loud enough for her to hear.

Her face softened as she granted me one last quick peck.

“I’ve always loved you too.”

But, selfish as I was, I needed more.

Forever was a big concept, one I didn’t have the words to voice, even if it was what I wanted. I had lived the previous six years dying for a sense of belonging like the one I had here. In that moment, I was being loud and emotional, doing all the things I once thought made me terrible, and no one was upset with me. They weren’t yelling, calling me embarrassing, or even telling me to stop. They were looking at me with so much warmth that the lingering ice around my heart melted away, leaving me beautifully defenseless. The feeling was just as terrifying as it was wonderful. And at that moment, all my what-ifs and worst fears suddenly didn’t matter.

“If you love me, does that mean I can stay even after Seb finishes the case?”

Sophia ran her hands through my hair as the tears I had been denying finally escaped.

“Of course, Mason. We’ll always have room for you.”

Chapter 43

Mason

Once the night wound down, I took the chance to sneak off to the bathroom between Lucian and Cameron’s bedrooms—not because I had to pee, but because I was going to do something no one in the house would approve of. With the door locked, I grabbed my phone from the pocket of my PJs.

I understood why I shouldn’t talk to my dad, but with his assistant flooding my phone, I was getting worried. Dad was probably just trying to get my attention so he could tell me how disappointed he was… but deep down, I hoped for good news.

Since I got pregnant, I had been waiting for some magical moment when my dad realized he loved me in spite of the fact that I had grown into an adult. I had never stopped craving my father’s affection, the love I lost when my mom originally dragged us to America. From that moment on, nothing I did could ever make him proud.

Every forum I read said that grandchildren had this bizarre way of healing their grandparents, fixing problems that noteven therapy could mend. Would Rosie’s birth finally bring us together?

Even if that never happened, I wanted to keep my dad close enough to prove I was a better parent than him.

I rubbed my stomach, causing Rosie to stir, as I dialed my dad’s number. He had a few different phones, but this one was just for close friends and family. He wanted to make sure it never got out to the public.

My brow furrowed as his voicemail filled the line. His assistant had called so many times, I assumed he’d pick up right away. Ignoring me wasn’t his style—James Albright would much rather scold his only child.

My phone stuck to my cheek as I pulled it away from my face. I scrunched my brow, silently performing the mental math required to figure out what time it was in Lyon. My dad didn’t normally go to sleep until six A.M, so he should still be awake. What could he be doing that would result in him not answering my call?

Maybe he got tired of me dodging his calls and just hopped on a plane. After all, I tagged Jade’s salon in a post, so he had a rough idea of where I was. If he was coming to America, that meant he cared enough to hunt me down. A smile my father didn’t deserve sprouted on my lips. The idea that my dad had possibly realized he loved me was a rush I couldn’t explain.

Today had been so perfect I couldn’t even fathom it belonged to me. After six years of literal hell on earth, my life was looking up. I tapped my fingers together as I formed a mental list of everything I had to do before my dad inevitably found me. I needed to get my nails filed and get my hair trimmed and—

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