Page 77 of Please Hate Me

“Let me know when you get home,” he whispered.

As I walked out of the shop, I couldn’t stop hating myself. I needed Lucian, but I had irreparably damaged our relationship by leaving the way I did. We used to have something beautiful, the kind of love you’re lucky to get once in a lifetime. We were broken people, but our shattered pieces fit together with each other like a puzzle. A beautiful tragedy, a perfect asymmetry.

Now we were hate-fucking, and he couldn’t even bring himself to kiss me.

And it was all my fault.

Chapter 22

Cameron

I’d been lucky enough to avoid awkward moments with Mason up until now, but I had to admit, this one took the cake. She sat in my truck, eyes fixed on the floor, stiff as a board. We’d barely exchanged hellos since she got in, and I couldn’t think of a single conversation topic that didn’t involve the baby. I couldn’t help it; last night, her stomach had just a subtle curve, but today, she looked almost ready to pop.

How far along did she say she was?

Shit. This was easily the most nerve-wracking thing to happen to me recently, and I needed a cigarette. But I couldn’t have one, because I promised her I’d quit.

God dammit.

My fingers went white as I gripped the steering wheel. I had to make sure nobody saw Mason in my car looking like this. One wrong move, and Dale would show up and crush this little slice of paradise I had spent years crafting.

I finally had independence, a respectable persona: I was the town preacher, a humble farmhand, helping out the old farmer’sgranddaughter and her high school sweetheart. I could be with both Sophia and Lucian, and nobody questioned the nature of our relationship. But it seemed things had gone too smoothly for too long.

To top it all off, I had a migraine from hell.

Most of my anger subsided as Mason shifted uncomfortably in her seat—I was sure she could sense my foul mood. I needed to take a deep breath and focus on the now.

“I, uh, I got you a coffee too. I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I just got you a vanilla iced latte,” I explained, trying my best to sound cheery. “It’s what Sophia normally drinks. It’s really sweet, and I thought you might enjoy it because you’re, well…”

Mason looked up at me. “Pregnant?”

I choked on air.

“No, nothing like that.”

Truthfully, itwaspart of the decision. I wanted to sneak some milk into her system to make sure she got some nutrients mixed in with her caffeine and water. I wasn’t sure if she had breakfast, but I didn’t want to risk being seen by offering to take her to a diner.

“I did it because you’re, well, sweet.”

My face went hot after I said that, so I looked away, desperately trying to focus on the road. Still, I couldn’t keep myself from glancing at her in my rearview mirror.

“You think I’m sweet?”

I swallowed hard and nodded once. Usually, I had a first-rate poker face, but all my emotional walls crumbled to dust around Mason. One soft push from her miniature hands and my carefully crafted defenses would disintegrate.

“I think you’re cute, too.”

Her blue eye was piercing as she studied me, but it was the intelligent spark in the endlessly deep brown eye that I found myself lost in. What kinds of thoughts lived behind those eyes?

Would she stay long enough for me to find out?

“Cameron?”

“Yes?”

“Do you love me?”

Shock caused me to slam on the brakes, and my truck skidded to a screeching halt in the middle of the barren road. Mason jerked forward, and I threw an arm over her chest to prevent her from getting whiplash.

---