Page 63 of Soothsayer

I still felt like a failure for not doing better, and it was worse hearing it from him. I shook my head and ignored the stubborn pain in my chest. “Still. That sucked.”

“It was probably worse for you than for me, objectively.” Sören shut his eyes. “Youkilledyourself. You were dying, and the vættir and my father were fighting, and all I wanted to do was run over to you and try to stop the blood, because it…it was wrong, you know? It just lookedwrong.But I couldn’t move the vættir, so I did the only thing I could.”

“Changed your intent.”

“It wasn’t that much of a change, really,” he said. “I went into it in the beginning knowing that my sacrifice was really for you. It was the price I paid for your life, and it helped my family, so there was almost no downside.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” I swore, because honestly. “Where did you get such a fucking martyr complex?”

“Where did you?” he countered, which?fair enough. I shut up, and he continued after a moment. “So things changed, and the vættir killed Ólafur so that the old deal was completely severed, and then he saved you. That took a while, by the way. You’d lost so much blood by then.” He glanced up at me now. “The more the vættir does for you, the tighter the bond becomes. The firsttime he healed you, it wasn’t lifesaving, but this time it definitely was. Your life is literally tied to us now. The farther apart you are from us, the harder it will be to focus, to sleep, to work your magic. We’re all joined, for better or for worse, unless the vættir makes another deal or you die.”

“Wow.” Those were repercussions I hadn’t considered, but getting them clarified wasn’t the first thing on my mind right now. “Is that what you came in to explain? The way this deal works?”

“What do you think?”

“I don’t know. You haven’t spoken a word to me for two months.”

“I was too angry to be rational,” Sören admitted. “And it’s easier to keep a distance when the vættir is using my mind, but it’s off communing with nature right now, so it’s just me. And I can’t keep this up. I miss you too much.”

“Fuck.” Two months, and I’d been worried it was the start of the rest of my life, being with Sören but denied him at the same time. I held my hand out to him, and he took it without hesitation, and that was it.

I pulled him in for a kiss and I got an armful instead, Sören moving Lady to the floor before he straddled my waist, one hand wound through my too-long hair to hold my head still while he had his way with my mouth. I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him in so close I could feel his heart beating?hisheart, and it was mine, so wholly and completely beyond a shadow of a doubt. I’d never possessed anything so precious in my whole life.

“I’m sorry,” I said again when I had a moment to breathe. “I’m so sorry, I—”

“No,” Sören said. “That’s over. Don’t waste any more time on it.” He smiled at me, and it was sly and wicked and the sortof thing I hadn’t seen nearly enough of in the time we’d had together. “I think you should fuck me instead.”

I was fortunate not to pass out from the world’s most embarrassing blood rush right then and there. “Yes,” I agreed emphatically, and then?

Sex was a funny thing for me, always has been. Sometimes it was smooth and easy, and sometimes it was completely goofy, full of misplaced elbows and stubborn zippers. There must have been someone looking out for me, though, because not only were we both undressed in under a minute, but I also didn’t drop the lube, the bed didn’t break, Lady didn’t howl or stare, and then I had Sören splayed out beneath me, breathing hard as I slid a finger inside of him.

If it had been a long time sinceI’dhad sex, hell, the last timehe’dfucked anyone was?me. Sören writhed against the cheap sheets, unable to keep his hands off me as I prepped him, taking my time because two years was a long stretch to go without, and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt him.

Still… “No,” I said when he closed his eyes as I pressed three fingers into him. “Look at me, keep looking at me. I have to know…”That it’s youwent unspoken, but Sören understood. He opened his eyes, the hazy blue obscured by huge pupils, and his body clenched around my hand.

“Now,” he begged. “Now, I can’t wait anymore, please.”

That was convenient, because neither could I. I slicked myself gingerly, positioned myself just right, and—oh fuck, it was slow and hot and sotight. Sören drew me down against him as soon as he could, wrapping his legs around my back and driving me deeper.

“Slow,” he whispered, kissing my ear. “Like this.”

We hadn’t done it like this very often, a gentle push-pull, none of the long thrusts and quick pace that got us off fast. This was quiet, me barely moving at all, and I knew I couldn’t be doingmuch for his prostate, but Sören didn’t seem to care. He clutched my shoulders and kissed me again and again, and I let him take control, because he had so little of it in anything else. I wanted to give him exactly what he wanted, and right now that was the slow, tender grind of body flush to body, our skin slipping against each other’s without creating any unwelcome space between us. His cock was trapped against my belly, rubbing wetly, hard and red.

I was drowning in Sören, surrounded by him, enveloped in him. Fuck, I never wanted it to end, but it had to, because my entire body was trembling with the need to come, every muscle tightening in anticipation.

“Sören.”

“Yes,” he said, “Yes, yes, Cillian,fuck,” and he came, and then I did, and?

And I just about died. It was amazing and intense and almost painful, the sudden surge of pleasure so strong it blinded me. How did people live through this? If I could have died right then, I would have gone happy, but I couldn’t die; I could never do that to Sören again. I inhaled his breaths and used his strength to hold myself up, and eventually I existed again without feeling like I’d been broken open.

We separated just enough to clean up a little and then drowsed in the bed, wrapped up together.I have to get a bigger bed, I mused as we dozed. Or maybe not?it was kind of nice to be so close. I opened my eyes and turned to ask Sören about it, and—

“That was very enjoyable.”

“Holy shit!” I reared back and fell off the bed as purple eyes met mine. I hit the floor hard, taking the cover with me. Lady came out from her basket and licked at my chin, and Sören—the vættir—stared down at me with amusement.

“Well, that looked exciting.”

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