Page 80 of Hollowed

Igrowled, puffing my breath to move the strand of hair that had fallen in my face. “Thisisn’t working,Henry.”

“You’llget there.Justtry again.”

We’dbeen trying to tap into whatever powers my phoenix magic could offer for hours now, the afternoon sun dipping behind the horizon in the distance.Ina small courtyard behindPriscilla’sshop, they’d both taken turns trying to help me access my powers, but so far,I’donly achieved more of the same.

Grittingmy teeth,Itried again, pushing the flames out from my chest and into my hands.Spheresof flame appeared, and while only days agoIwould have been in awe, nowIwas frustrated.Flexingmy jaw to ease the ache of a forming headache,Iwilled the flames out, lobbing the spheres at a wall of waterPriscillahad conjured.Steamhissed as the two met, andIturned around to face the two older witches observing me.

“Ican’t do it without being afraid for my life.Whichis very unhelpful becauseIcan’t remember whatIwas thinking or feeling at the time.”Irubbed at the back of my neck roughly, trying to ease the twinge spreading across my shoulder.Mybody was wound tight, ready to snap like a bowstring.Thisfrustration would get me nowhere.

Blowingout a breath,Irotated my head, clenching and unclenching my fists asItried to relax and focus on my powers.

“Youare putting too much pressure on yourself,”Priscillacalled, looking up from the books spread out in front of her on the table she’d hadHenrybring outside.

Henrynodded. “Youcannot be afraid of yourself.Fightit or accept it, fear it, or control it.Youcannot do both, dear girl.”

“Letit come naturally to you,”Priscillaadded.

“Wedon’t have time to let it come naturally.”Itried not to snap at the woman, but from the raise of her brow,Iwasn’t positiveIsucceeded.Mycheeks flushed, butIdidn’t apologize. “Wehave to save him.”

Sighing, she marked her place in the book and closed it, standing up.Shewalked over to me and took my hands. “Katrina,Alexanderis a powerful man.Hewill not break so easily.Wehave some time.”

“He’sin danger because of me.”Myvoice broke on the last word, the damI’dput up around my emotions crumbling like sand as tears burned in my throat. “Thisis my fault,Priscilla.”

Evenwith my vision blurred by tears,Icould see her shaking her head. “Notin the slightest.”

“Katrina,”Henrymuttered, stepping up and taking one of my hands fromPriscilla. “Youhave led a hard life, my girl—oneIwouldn’t wish on anyone.Butyour vision is clouded by it.Noneof this is your fault.Thefault lies with your parents, with theCiallmhar, withDeath.Evensome of it with theDullahanhimself.Butnone of it is your fault.”

“IfIwould have gone toCiarasooner, made her listen…”Iblew out a breath. “Herbrother is alive, andInever got to tell her.Maybeit would have changed things.”

“Ciarawas grieving,” he said, shaking his head. “Youcannot fault yourself for that either.”

“Alexandersaid he tried to tell theCiallmharthat he wouldn’t take the sacrifices.”Irubbed the toe of my boot into the dirt to avoid meeting either of their gazes.Iwas struggling to keep the tears from spilling. “Whydidn’t they listen?”

Priscillasighed. “Becausetradition blinds those who live by its rules.Itleaves no room for growth.”

“Ihate them,”Iwhispered as a tear escaped, rolling a path down my cheek before dripping from my chin into the dirt.Icovered it with my boot and sniffed, raising my head.

“Noone blames you for that,”Henryreaffirmed. “Noone at all.”

Asmuch asIwanted to drop to my knees and cry, rage at the town that had doomed us to this fate,IknewIneeded to get up and do something.Deathwantedme.Iwould not be like my parents;Iwould not let the innocent suffer for my actions.Alexanderwas taken, andIneeded to get him back.

Newfoundresolved burned in my stomach, an ember flickering to life.SqueezingbothPriscillaandHenry’shands,Ilifted my chin high. “Let’stry again.”

“That’smy girl.”Henrygave a proud smile, patting the top of my hand.HeandPriscillastepped back asImoved to the other side of the courtyard.

“Focuson your confidence,Katrina,”Priscillacalled. “Youcan do this.Butyou must believe you can.”

Nodding,Icontinued untilIreached the back left corner of the courtyard, moving all the way to turn and face the water wall along the opposite corner.Rollingmy shoulders back,Itook a deep breath.

Focus,Katrina,Itold myself, rolling my neck side to side.Iclosed my eyes, visualizing the flames crawling beneath my skin and remembering the feeling of the fire consuming me.Myhands warmed as the flames built, and then the warmth spread, encircling my forearms.Ididn’t want to open my eyes to look, lestIruin it, soIsqueezed them closed even tighter, willing the flames up my arms before seeing them as coils of embers.

Theheat spread up my arms, reaching the creases of my elbows.

Andthen it died.Thecool breeze of the early evening washed over me, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Openingmy eyes,Ideflated, shoulders slumping asIrealized the fire had gone out, yet again.Faintgold light from the setting sun lit across my fingers.

“Maybewe should take a break,”Priscillaoffered. “Comesit with me and look through the books—see if we can find something aboutDeaththere.Maybewe can find some weaknesses we can exploit.”

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