Page 135 of Wicked & Wildflower

I want to snort at that, but I choke it back.

“Is she happy?” my mother continues.

“She’s very happy.”

“And you… Are you happy?”

Chocolate brown eyes and steady, tattooed hands flash across my vision, bringing a smile to my face, one I know she can hear in my voice when I say, “I’m happy.”

“Good,” she breathes, sounding almost relieved. “Good. And Lucille?”

“Lou is doing well,” I murmur.

“Thank goodness.” She’s quiet for a moment before she continues, “I…I want you to know that I heard what your father tried to do. I overheard him speaking to Jason about it yesterday morning. I–I would’ve called you if I had known beforehand. I would’ve tried to do something to stop him before he went that far.”That’s a first. I’m stunned by my mother’s admission and the sound of her voice breaking. “I left him, Dahlia.”

“What?” I crawl back onto my bed, covering my feet with blankets, as if it’ll somehow protect me from what I’ve just heard.

“I’m in Indianapolis with my sister. I arrived yesterday evening.” She sniffles. “I didn’t tell him where I was going, but I have no doubt he’ll figure it out soon enough. He’s a little caught up in rage over your sister’s wedding right now, so I imagine it’ll take some time for him to recover from that. I’m hoping his fury toward me will take a backseat for a while.”

“You left him?”

“Yeah.” A soft sob rips from her throat. “He crossed the line. He’sbeencrossing the line for years. I’m so sorry my line wasn’t you, Dahlia. I’m sorry for that, and I know that nothing I ever do will make it up.”

Tears stream down my face, and I do nothing to wipe them away, wishing she could see the way she’s breaking me once again.

“My line should’ve been you, the same way yours has always been your daughter. It was my responsibility to teach you, but instead, you’re the person I had to learn from, and I’m so sorry.”

I don’t know how to respond. I don’t forgive her, and I’m not sure I can accept her apology either. I don’t know if I have it in me, though it still feels like some inner child deep inside me is being embraced by her mother for the first time in her life.

“Dad has been doing a lot of shady, illegal shit, and I found out about it. I had proof, and I turned it over to authorities earlier tonight. A warrant should be issued for his arrest in the next few days,” I find myself blurting out. “I hope they get him before he gets to you. Darby and I wanted to make sure you were aware this was coming.”

“Thank you,” she says quietly.

“You’re welcome,” I respond, unsure of what else could be said. “I… I’ve got to get going, get Lou to bed. Good—”

“Dahlia,” she interrupts. “I…If you…If you ever need anything, if you everwantanything from me, I’m here.” She sighs. “And thank you. For breaking the cycle. For saving them both.”

I know she’s referring to my sister and my daughter.

“I wish someone could’ve saved you,” I whisper.

“I wish I could’ve saved you.”

“I didn’t want to be saved.”

She chuckles. “No, I suppose you didn’t, but it sounds like you were nonetheless.” She’s quiet before adding, “I hope he’s good to you.”

“Better than I deserve.” My nose stings, and a knot of emotion forms at the center of my chest.

“You deserve everything, Dahlia.”

Tears spill over again. Not sad or broken or angry tears, but ones of gratitude. Suddenly desperate to be back in his arms, I choke out, “Bye, Mom.”

“Bye, Dahlia, darling.”

I hang up, dropping my phone onto the sheets next to me. My head falls against my knees as I let out a lifetime of pent up insecurity and loneliness.

I’m not healed, and I haven’t forgiven her. I’m not ready to rebuild any kind of relationship with her, and I’m not sure I ever will be, but I think I finally received the one thing I needed more than the rest.

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