Page 78 of Promise Me

She’s right. Anything else that comes out will be an excuse.

I toss my hands up and let them drop my sides.

“Okay, then,” she says and turns for the back room, looking over her shoulder. “When the checklist of why you think we can’t do this runs out, come find me.”

“Sadie …”

She stops and turns abruptly. “Don’t Sadie me, Hudson. I’ve spent the last three years living a life I can’t remember anymore. Maybe it wasn’t one worth remembering. Maybe that’s why I’m where I am now. I told you I’m done worrying about the choices I made before. I want to live in the present and move forward. Kissing you just now wasn’t wrong. Nothing about it was wrong, and I plan to do it again, so I’m going upstairs now so that you can take whatever time you need to process the fact that no matter the obstacle life has thrown at you, you do actually deserve to take a risk again and you do deserve to be happy.”

She doesn’t even wait for me to reply. Not that I even know what I was going to say.

Is she right?

Is that what I’m doing, telling myself I can’t have this because one part of my life was cut short? Do I think I’m not allowed to be happy again?

The door in the back slams, and I wince.

I turn back to the bar and spot the broken glass on the floor.

A month ago, I would have known what to do next. I’d have taken the safe route. The one in which I knew the results before it started. But right now, for the first time in a long time, I want to take the route that requires work.

I just … what if I put in the work and her memory comes back?

What happens then?

CHAPTER NINETEEN

SADIE

Men.

Arrgh.

I all but stomp the entire way up the stairs that lead to Hudson’s apartment.

That kiss was the best kiss of my life, and he apologized for it.

Screw that.

I unlock the door and close it before dropping onto the couch.

I get it. He’s best friends with my brother, and he doesn’t want to do anything that would jeopardize their relationship, and yes, I understand that a month ago, we apparently hated each other. But that was then, and this is now, and oh my god, why can’t it just be simple?

Girl meets boy, boy meets girl, they smile at each other, they ask to hang out, and then they kiss. Voila, they fall madly in love and live happily ever after.

It sounds so simple.

I grab a pillow off the couch and cover my face, letting out a scream.

I can’t remember the last time I felt this way. Ever. I don’t need to have memory loss to know this feeling, thisconnection, has never happened with anyone else.

I toss the pillow that muted my screams to the side and stand up.

I should go back down there. Communicate and tell him exactly how I feel. This is how it works, right?

Yes, this is how it works.

I jog down the steps and high-five Ian as I pass through the kitchen and march my happy ass back to the bar, ready to bare my heart to Hudson. But the moment I step out of the kitchen, I spot my brother sitting at the bar top. He’s leaning forward on the counter, talking to Hudson, who is hunched over cleaning the broken glass.

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