Page 16 of Until Then

“Or maybe,” she takes another sip of her own slushie like she’s chasing away the taste of mine, “you have bad taste, and this is an entirely different discussion all together.”

I let out a low breath. “Touché.”

We stay there, parked in the gas station parking lot, until we’ve finished our slushies. When we’re done, I get out and toss them into the trash can near the entrance of the building.

“Thank you,” Izzy says when I get back in the truck.

Confused by the genuine awe in her tone, I frown. “It’s just a slushie. You don’t have to keep thanking me.”

With that, I roll my window down partway and put the truck into reverse.

She’s focused on something outside the passenger window,her voice so soft I almost miss it, when she says, “It’s more than that.” Then she clears her throat and, voice louder, adds, “This is the first time I’ve been genuinely happy in months.”

I don’t reply, because my heart is aching for her, and frankly, I don’t know what to say. I just crank the volume up on the radio and navigate toward home.

5

IZZY

I’ve been workingnonstop for more than a decade. I was a literal teenager when I started my YouTube channel. After I graduated from high school and focused on social media full time, I would film a handful of videos each week—more, if inspiration struck—so that I’d have drafts ready to post every couple of days.

Initially, after the Lux incident, I continued posting like normal. After the third week, though, it became obvious that I needed to step away. I’d also stopped filming videos in bulk to have on hand since I was feeling so low.

My camera sits like a heavy brick weight in my tote bag, taunting me to pull it out and film as I stroll down Main Street.

It’s a beautiful, warm day. The sun is bright and the air is salty from the ocean. Wonton walks ahead of me, a bounce to his step. He’s clearly happy to be out and about after beingholed up for the past few days. I’ve only been out to stock up on veggies, since Derrick is apparently allergic to the color green.

Until now, I didn’t realize what a tourist town Parkerville becomes in the spring and summer months. Far more people mill around than I’ve ever seen here before. Even on the day Via opened her studio. They stroll leisurely down the sidewalks, checking out one pop-up shop after another that are set up like a flea market. I wander over to one, eyeing the silver jewelry.

“Sit,” I tell Wonton.

Dutifully, he obeys, his tongue hanging halfway out of his mouth while he smiles up at me.

“He’s cute,” the woman at the booth says. “Maltese?”

“He is.”

“Do you mind if I pet him?”

Holding a bracelet made with sea glass beads, I smile at her. “Go for it. He loves the attention.”

She doesn’t have to be told twice. Without another word, she rounds her table and drops to her knees to give Wonton scratches.

“Do you make these?” I ask, holding another bracelet up to the light.

She tilts her head back and inspects the jewelry with a fond look on her face. “Yeah. I do it in my spare time. If I don’t keep my hands busy, I feel like I’m going crazy.”

With a small laugh, I clutch the bracelet and move down her booth to the selection of necklaces. “I know how that is.”

Having so little to do for the past few months has made me all but certifiably insane. The good news is that I’m finally putting a dent in the giant to-be-read list I started several years ago.

But it’s difficult, this place I’m in. Because I don’t quite know who I am if I’m not filming. It sounds pathetic, even in my own mind, but it’s really all I know, and I’ve always loved it.

Though this time away from filming has spurred questions in my mind about the future. About what comes next. Because even if I hadn’t been canceled on the internet, I can’t vlog and post fashion and travel videos forever.

I end up purchasing the bracelet and a few rings before I continue on my way. There’s a coffee shop on Main Street that I’ve always loved working in, so I head there. Only I don’t have anythingtowork on.

Scooping Wonton under my arm, I go in to order.

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