Page 7 of Until Then

Smiling, she perches on the edge of the counter, watching me devour the macaroni. “How are you doing? And be honest with me.”

Layla knows better than anyone what I’ve been dealing with, since she fields my emails and messages.

My stomach twists, and I grimace. “Why do you think I’m here?”

Her lips turn down in sympathy. “You can talk to me. I’m happy to listen.”

“I know.” I inhale another bite of food. “But you already know most of the details. The follower count, the brand deals I’ve lost. I used to love making YouTube videos, and anymore, that isn’t even fun.”

The things I used to find joy in leave me feeling anxious and stressed.

She gives me a sad smile. “It’ll blow over eventually.”

That’s what I thought, too, but I figured it would have happened by now. Instead, internet trolls continue to edit new videos with clips from the interview, keeping the fuel of hatred going.

In record time, I’ve finished my princess-shaped meal. I quickly rinse the bowl and load it into the dishwasher. “If you don’t mind,” I say with a sigh, “I’m going to shower and go to bed. Or… couch.”

The sympathy in her eyes as she watches me make my wayto the bathroom only makes what’s become a permanent ache in my chest more acute.

When I get out of the shower, Layla has already gone to bed, and Wonton is asleep on my pillow. With a sigh, I scoot him over and lie down.

She’s right. The couch sucks. But I find myself drifting off to sleep within minutes.

3

IZZY

Poke.

Poke.

Poke.

I crack one eye open, finding a grinning Lilibet with her index finger extended, ready to shove it into my cheek again.

“Hi, Lili.” With a groan, I heave myself up to sitting and wipe the drool from my mouth.

The little girl tilts her head and frowns up at me, thoughtful. “Why are you sleeping on our couch?”

“Lili,” Layla admonishes from the hallway, her hands on her hips. “I told you to let her sleep.”

Lili’s brows shoot up as she whips her head around and faces her mom. “She was already awake.”

Head dropped back, Layla huffs. “Sure she was.”

Wonton, finally roused by the commotion, yips, launching his tiny body at Lili and showering her with kisses.

While the two love on one another, I rub at my eyes, willing my body to perk up. Sadly, it’s not working. Only an espresso shot—or five—will be capable of that.

Layla, dressed for the day, shuffles into the kitchen. “Bacon and eggs sound good to you, Izzy?”

With a grateful smile, I nod. “Sounds delicious.”

I change into fresh clothes and take Wonton out to potty. He spends an awful long time sniffing a light post before finally hiking his leg and peeing. Boys.

When he’s finished, he makes sure to kick the grass with his back feet.

While he searches for a spot to finish his business, I turn my phone on and check my messages. There is a string of texts from Finneas. Unsurprising. As well as a few from my sister. Even one from Reid that pulls a bark of laughter from me.

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