Page 55 of Liam

And his cock. I desperately wanted to taste his cock.

Me: Scrolling through a long list of ideas in my mind.

Jamal: You'll stay overnight with me again?

Me: Only if you don't mind being bear-hugged all night.

Jamal: Sounds perfect.

I needed to let him go. He'd be getting up in five hours.

Me: See you Thursday. Usual time?

Jamal: Not five again. You're not cooking your own birthday dinner.

Me: Fine. I'll come at six and bring my pajamas.

Jamal: Haha.

Me:

I rolled onto my back and grinned giddily up at the ceiling. I didn't know what it was going to look like, being intimate with Jamal, but I couldn't wait to find out.

The thought of being with him in that way, to have our bodies touch, brought me such honest and remarkable bliss. Whatever we did together was going to be perfect for us.

I could sense it.

Dinner was fabulous. Mamma and Dadi had cooked a meal of grilled chicken breast, mountains of baked broccoli, and a green salad. All the things I typically ate. So much care and attention had been put into planning the birthday meal. Instead of a cake, they had made the best fruit salad.

I did my best to eat everything.

Theadultswere in the kitchen, doing the dishes, leaving the younger generation to talk.

"Another three years and you'll be forty," Noah said, grinning at me.

"I'm not worried. I'm aging like fine wine."

Jamal put his hand on my thigh discreetly beneath the table. "I have an appreciation for wine."

"Which brings up something," Noah said. "Have you stopped drinking?"

"For weeks now," I replied. "I'm strictly a water guy."

Noah's eyebrows rose and he rested back in his chair. "Congratulations."

Jamal squeezed my thigh and stroked it. Getting through dinner was agonizing. I appreciated all the effort but so badly wanted to be alone with Jamal.

"Let's take this to the living room," Meera suggested.

As we settled, the rest of Jamal's family joined us. It was a full room. I claimed a chair with space beside me so Jamal could position himself next to me.

On the coffee table, there was an assortment of wrapped presents. I hadn't noticed them from the dining room. Seeing them there, knowing they were for me, I was overrun by emotion. It felt as if Jamal's family had taken me in. Would they be as welcoming if they knew my history?

I'd lived my adult life chasing outward beauty and every man I could get my hands on. I hadn't spent much time on the inside. In fact, my insides had been damaged by life. Nothing like what Jamal had been through, though. I wanted to reachfor Jamal's hand. I felt guilty for even considering my issues to be worthy of attention when I thought about Jamal. How shallow was I for thinking my problems and obsessions deserved any kind of recognition?

"Hey." Jamal nudged me with his elbow. "Mamma is talking to you."

"Sorry." I frowned and shook my head to dislodge the disruptive thoughts, then smiled at Mamma. "Got lost in my head." She held out a present to me.

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