Page 84 of Liam

I'd started the application months ago. I'd been assured when I phoned recently that it was a matter of days until it was approved. I'd need to provide three meals a day for each youth but running a shelter opened us up for more funding. I had hope it would be enough.

Later that night when I was in bed, I couldn't sleep. Avery and Liam were on my mind. I could hear Meera bumping around in her kitchen. I hadn't confided in her yet. I'd brushed her off when I threw my wheelchair down the stairs. It wasn't like me to not talk to her.

I transferred into my wheelchair, pulled on a t-shirt, wheeled into the front entry, and knocked on her door. She was pleased to see me, her smile bright. "Do you want some tea?"

I followed Meera into her apartment. "If you have some decaf, sure."

"I'm making chamomile."

"Perfect."

She removed two cups from the cupboard and dropped teabags into them. The kettle was already spitting out steam and water droplets. She filled each cup with hot water.

"Are you ready to tell me what's going on?" Meera asked.

"I need your advice." We headed for her living room which was a mix of antique and ultra modern furnishings. It worked. I always felt comfortable here. She set my cup on a coffee table.

"I'll do my best."

"I broke up with Liam."

Meera's eyebrows shot up. "Why on earth would you do that? You adore him."

"I was afraid he'd find out about my conviction."

Now she frowned. "You would need to have that conversation with him eventually."

"I know, but I was scared of losing him."

"So … you broke up with him?"

"Don't get on my case. I know it makes no sense." I lifted my tea and held the hot cup in my hands, warming them. "A few days ago, I told Liam what happened with Richard, how I treated him, and about my assault conviction. He said he needed to think about it."

"Well, that's more promising than him telling you to fuck off."

"Maybe he should. I didn't come to him when I should have. His birth father came to see me. He knew about myconviction and threatened to tell Liam if I didn't break up with him."

"Why would he care about you being with Liam?"

"Take your pick. Sexuality, race, occupation, or disability. Most likely all of the above."

"And that's why you broke up with him."

"I was wrong to do it. I should have gone straight to Liam and told him everything."

"That would have been the right thing to do."

"I know." I took a sip of my tea. The earthy essence reminded me of the taste of Liam's skin. "I spoke to Noah today. He told me Liam was suffering. That he doesn't know what to do."

"That means he hasn't decided to walk away. That's good news."

I sighed and set my cup back on the coffee table. "I'm in love with him, Meera."

"Oh, wow … so soon?"

"I think I fell in love with Liam the first time we ever spoke. While we were at Noah's wedding. There was something about his gentle nature that hooked my soul from the start. After following him on social media, showing off his body, he wasn't what I'd been expecting. I thought I was about to engage with someone who would want to talk about mindless things. Instead, he asked me about the youth centre. Told me how much he admired me for the work I did.

"Then we went to the museum together and I realized how complex he is. The conversations between us were meaningful and honest. We shared openly about our lives. Built the beginnings of a bond. He's the sweetest most caring and loving man I've ever encountered. Seeing him interacting with you and the rest of the family sealed it for me. I could imagine a future with Liam."

---