Page 86 of Born into Chaos

He squeezes my hand again. “It scares the hell out of me to hear you say that.”

I give a soft laugh and squeeze his hand back. “I’m just as surprised by it as you are. Not even sugar sounds good right now. Vitya would be stunned.”

Saying his name has my voice cracking a bit, but I bite my lip and take a shaky breath, refusing to give it free rein. Fear and a grief unlike anything I’ve ever known threaten to overwhelm me, but I can’t allow myself to give into it, not yet at least, not while there’s still hope.

Val and Yelena sit with me for another hour, and when I’m convinced I’m seconds away from losing my mind with worry, I hear the door across the hall open. I jump to my feet and race across the room, watching as Dr. Bianchi steps out. He’s in surgical scrubs and looks as exhausted as I feel.

“How is he?” I quickly ask.

“He’s alive.”

As soon as I hear the words, my knees buckle right before my brother catches me and Dr. Bianchi quickly adds, “But he’s not in the clear yet, Svetlana. The bullet did a lot of damage, and he lost a lot of blood. He’s in a coma.”

“What?” I clutch at Val’s arm, using him for balance while Yelena supports me on my other side. “What do you mean? Is he going to wake up?”

“There’s no way to tell. His vitals are stable, and I see no evidence of brain damage. He’s alive, but we’re still on very delicate ground here,” he says, and I know it’s his way of gently preparing me for the fact that Vitya could still die.

“Do you have any idea how long it could last?” Val asks him.

“Could be hours, could be days, could be weeks. I really don’t know.” Dr. Bianchi reaches out to squeeze my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Sveta. We did everything we could for him.”

“I know you did. Thank you,” I tell him. “Can I see him?”

“Of course, as soon as you’re ready to. Tony’s still in there. Vitya is breathing on his own, but there’s a nasal cannula in place to help deliver oxygen. It’s nothing to be alarmed about, though. Just be with him and talk to him. That’s what he needs right now.”

Dr. Bianchi gives my shoulder another squeeze before walking towards the stairs. I know he’ll give Dominic an update on his way to the apartment he shares with Lucia before he crashes into bed and gets some much-needed sleep.

“Do you want us to go with you?” Val asks, and I clutch his hand tighter.

“Don’t you dare let me go just yet.”

He and Yelena tighten their grip on me, and instead of beating myself up about being weak, I lean on them for support, so fucking grateful they’re here with me so I don’t have to walk into that room alone.

With shaky, unsteady steps, I walk to the door with Val on my left and Yelena on my right, and when I open it and see Vitya lying unconscious with his chest a mess of bandages and cords coming off him in various places, I let out a sob and run to him. Stopping right next to the hospital bed, I look down at him, unsure of where I can touch him. The tube that Dr. Bianchi told me about is hooked around his ears and against his nose, and I’ve never seen Vitya look so small before. He’s always been a larger-than-life presence, and I don’t like the reminder that he’s human, that he’s capable of getting hurt and being taken from me.

Letting out another sob, I cup his face and lean closer, resting my forehead against his as I cover his face in my tears. “Come back to me, Vitya,” I whisper, hoping that wherever he is he can hear me. “I love you. Please come back to me.”

I gently kiss his lips, hating when they remain still and unresponsive, so unlike the passionate man I’ve grown used to, and when I stand up, I see Tony checking the machines around us.

“Thanks, Tony,” I tell him, knowing that without his help, this could’ve easily gone the other way.

He looks over at me and gives me a small smile. His blue eyes may be partially hidden behind his glasses, but I can easily see how exhausted he is. Tony isn’t much older than me and my cousins, but we rarely see him. He’s usually buried down here stitching someone up. Between the Alessi Mafia and my family’s Bratva, we keep him pretty busy.

“You can sit on the edge of the bed, but be careful to not put any weight on his chest. He has some internal stitches as well as a line of them on both the entrance and exit wounds. His breathing looks good, though, Sveta.” He gives me a smile that’s meant to be reassuring without giving too much hope. “He’s strong, and he’s fighting like hell to stay here with you.”

I thread my fingers through Vitya’s limp hand and nod my head, not trusting myself to speak.

“Talk to him as much as you can, let him know you’re here.” He pushes a few more buttons and then says, “I’ll be back and forth all day, but I’ll be notified if anything changes on his monitors.”

I thank him again and then very carefully sit down on the edge of Vitya’s bed, keeping his hand in mine. Val kisses my head before Yelena gives me one last hug.

“Let me know if you need anything at all, Sveta.” She keeps her arms around me until I nod and promise I will.

“Do you want us to stay? We don’t mind,” my brother says, but now that I’m holding Vitya’s hand and he’s right in front of me, all I want to do is be alone with him.

“I’m okay,” I tell him.

He digs into his pocket and then hands me the phone that I’d left at the farmhouse. “Text me if you need anything at all or if you just want to talk.”

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