Page 59 of Don't Scare Me, My Love

“But if it’s just about fucking you, it’s not a horror movie.”

“Not everything has to be scary.”

“With you, nothing is scary anyway.”

TWELVE

HORRORMOON

NICHOLAS

We were surrounded by trees,as always, although for a change, there were no mountains, and the trees looked different. Fewer needles, more leaves. Heavy guitars blared from the radio in my minivan.

Jason pointed to the right. “It should be here, just half a mile down the road.”

I turned on my blinkers and checked for oncoming traffic, even though we’d only seen three cars in the last fifty minutes—four if I counted the one parked in a driveway.

This place was even deader than Seastone. But the first rule of living in my minivan, which I had followed for years, was never to risk wrecking your mobile home. So, I was always checking for oncoming traffic.

As predicted, the street was as empty as my stomach. I turned and followed Jason’s directions. The trees hung so low that you couldn’t see anything but them—not a horizon, not the end of the road.

“Stop,stop,” Jason yelled, reaching for my shoulder.

I checked the rearview mirror to make sure there was no one behind us (there wasn’t, of course) and slammed on the brakes.

Jason pointed to a sign on our right.

Ghost Hill

Put your car in neutral and let the spirits push you.

As well-rehearsed as we were by now, Jason pulled out his phone, pointed it at me, and flipped his thumb up to show that he was recording.

I cleared my throat and turned to face the camera. “Hey, guys. It’s day three of our horrormoon, and today, my hubby took me to Ghost Hill. As you can see, the road is on a hill going up, but they say that if you put the car in neutral, the ghosts will push you up. Well, it’s time to find out if it’s true.”

With my hand on the gear stick, I waited for Jason to follow with the camera and then put the car in neutral. Jason panned back to me but moved the camera between our seats so that he could film me and the road in one shot.

We waited five seconds.

And another five.

Nothing happened.

I pulled my eyebrows together, trying to figure out if something was wrong because the car not moving at all was odd. My eyes darted to the dashboard, to the gearshift, and to my foot, which was still pressed deep into the brakes. “Oh, shit.” It laughed at the camera. “I need to take my foot off the brake, right?” I slowly let go and stared back at the road.

For another second, nothing—but then the car moved…forward.

Excitement flooded my body as I slapped my palms against the steering wheel. “No way.”

We, indeed, were moving up the hill. Slowly but steadily.

“There’s no fucking way,” I yelled into the camera, taking in what was happening.

We let the car roll for thirty seconds before I stepped on the brakes again, laughing like I was still twenty-one. I turned to the camera. “Well, I guess that was right. Wow! Thanks, guys. Stay tuned for our next stop.”

Jason ended the recording and let out a cheer he had been holding in for the sake of the video. “I didn’t think it wouldactuallylook like that.”

“It’s an optical illusion, isn’t it?”

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