Page 115 of The Scarlet Alchemist

The pearl monster had sunken its teeth into the Paper Alchemist’s neck, ripping through her like a starving animal, raking apart the tendons of her throat, gnawing through her collarbone. Her head tipped back, staring up to the ceiling, choked breaths gurgling and gasping.The blood on me isn’t mine.

I grabbed the monster’s arm and tried to yank him away from her, but my fingers slipped off the blood-slick pearl, and the monster didn’t budge, like he couldn’t even feel me. It hunched farther over the Paper Alchemist, her throat screaming open wider, hands twitching, eyes darting around the room.That was supposed to be me, I thought, my stomach clenching with nausea. Why was the monster ignoring me?

“Zilan!” the prince said, pulling me away. “It’s too late for her.”

My hands shook as the Paper Alchemist fell still. I couldn’t resurrect a body broken up into so many parts. That had been her last and only life.

The Empress outsmarted me, I realized, my whole body suddenly numb.

I pictured her in her bedroom, pouring the alchemists’ blood over her rags and sending them out with the physician, grinning and drinking tea from her gold-rimmed cup while knowing I’d just sentenced all the other alchemists to death.

I fell to my knees, hands sinking into the growing pool of hot blood, and let out a scream that barely sounded human, the red mirrored surface trembling at the sound. Once, I had dreamed of being a royal alchemist, and that dream had devoured everyone around me, had razed a palace to ruins, drowned the halls with blood. Once, I’d thought I could save everyone if I was only brave enough, and now everyone was dead.

All because of the Empress.

I rose to my feet, a dangerous quiet inside me.

“Zilan?” the prince said.

I wiped the Paper Alchemist’s blood from my face, walked past the pearl monster still devouring what was left of my friend, and made my way deeper into the palace.

It wasn’t hard to find the Empress—all of her guards were gathered in the garden just outside the throne room, fighting off the remaining alchemists.

I could have cried at the sight of the Moon Alchemist and River Alchemist still alive, wrestling guards to the ground. Their shoes crunched over shattered white shards and cracked limbs, as if the pearl monsters had crashed to pieces at their feet. The Moon Alchemist pressed a stone I couldn’t see to a guard’s face and blood burst from his ears and eyes, brain matter oozing out of his nose as he collapsed to the ground. She whirled around at the sound of our footsteps, expression softening when she met my gaze.

“Zilan!” she said, rushing to meet us. “Are you all right?”

She doesn’t hate me, I realized, stumbling toward her. I couldn’t help wrapping my arms around her, crushing my face into her chest and sobbing.“I’m sorry,”I said. “I didn’t know, I didn’t mean to—”

The Moon Alchemist held me back at arm’s length, bending down to my height. “Zilan, it’s not your fault,” she said. “The Empress tricked all of us.” Then she looked at the prince and let out a tense sigh. “You’re supposed to be securing the Emperor.”

“We can’t find him,” I said, wiping my face.

“Then forget about him,” she said. She jerked a finger at the prince. “Get him out of here. If he dies, we have no one to put on the throne. The rest of us will handle the Empress.”

I nodded quickly, taking a steadying breath. The Moon Alchemist wiped the tears from my face with her sleeve. “Leave,” she said. “It’s not safe for you here.”

Then she strode back to the guards.

The prince took my hand and gently tugged. “There’s a tunnel entrance around the corner,” he said. “If we—”

But he didn’t finish the thought, because a pearl monster burst through a window and tackled the Moon Alchemist into the pond.

My hand tensed, crushing the prince’s fingers. The Moon Alchemist was capable, but how could I leave her to clean up my mess? I thought of the Paper Alchemist twitching beneath the pearl monster. So many had died because of my mistake. I turned to the prince. “I—”

“Go,” he said, squeezing my hand, his eyes gentle, understanding. “Help her.”

I gripped his sleeve, shaking my head. “I can’t just send you off alone. This is all for nothing if we lose you.”

“The tunnels are gated, remember?” he said. “They’re the safest place here. I’ll cut across the grounds and look for my father.”

I knew he was right, yet I couldn’t let go. He took my face in his hands and pressed a searing kiss to my lips, and for a moment, I wasn’t standing in the bloody ruins of a kingdom I’d destroyed. There was no world but him and his soft smile and the dream I’d once believed in. He pulled away and my hands fell to my sides. I felt the same way as when I left Auntie and Uncle in Guangzhou—that this was the last time I would see them, and neither of us wanted to say it out loud.

“Give mother my regards,” he said, backing up. Then he turned and ran for the tunnels.

I took a deep breath, then ran for the Moon Alchemist, who was knee-deep in bloody water, fighting off a monster as it latched onto her forearm and tried to wrench it from her body. I jumped onto the monster’s back, locking my arms around its neck and forcing it away from her. It reared backward, trying to jolt me off, but I dug my knife into its spine and hacked away its soul tag.

It shattered apart, dropping me heavily onto the courtyard stairs. I rolled to my feet as the Moon Alchemist yanked me up by the collar.

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