Page 9 of Maar's Girl

I chuckle, shaking my head. "Picture this: I'm twelve years old, and Dad decides it's time for me to learn how to pilot a shuttle. Not a simulator, mind you. A real, honest-to-god shuttle."

"He didn't," Raaj says, eyes widening.

"Oh, he did. So there I am, barely tall enough to see over the controls, and he's barking orders like we're on the bridge of a battlecruiser. 'Check your altitude, Alyssa!' 'Mind that debris field!' As if I knew what half of it meant."

Raaj leans forward, clearly invested. "How'd you manage?"

"Well, let's just say the shuttle survived. Mostly." I grin, remembering the chaos. "I nearly clipped the docking bay on the way back in. Dad's face turned so red I thought he might pop a blood vessel. But you know what? The moment we were safely landed, he turned to me and said, 'Not bad for a first try, kiddo.'"

"Sounds like quite the character," Raaj muses.

I nod, a bittersweet smile tugging at my lips. "That's the Admiral for you. Tough as nails, but... he has his moments. Like this one time, I must've been about fifteen..."

As I launch into another story, I can't help but notice how attentively Raaj listens. There's something in his eyes – a mix of fascination and... is that longing? It occurs to me that I know so little about his own childhood. I make a mental note to ask him about it someday, when he's ready.

For now, though, I'm just happy to see him engaged, present in the moment. It feels like a breakthrough, however small. And as I continue regaling him with tales of my unconventional upbringing, I can't shake the feeling that we're building something here – a connection, a friendship. Maybe even something more.

I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of memories pressing down on me. "You know, Raaj, Horus IV wasn't my first brush with danger, but it was... different."

Raaj nods, his eyes focused on me with an intensity that both comforts and unnerves me.

"I had this friend, Kira. She was a journalist, fearless to a fault. Always chasing the next big story." I pause, swallowinghard. "She convinced me to go with her to Baragon. Said it'd be a quick in-and-out job."

"Let me guess," Raaj says softly, "it wasn't."

I shake my head. "Not even close. We were supposed to stay behind the front lines, but Kira... she couldn't resist getting closer. She said the real story was in the trenches."

My voice catches, and I feel Raaj's hand on mine. It's warm, comforting.

"We got separated in the chaos. By the time I found her..." I trail off, unable to finish.

"I'm so sorry, Alyssa," Raaj murmurs.

I squeeze his hand, grateful for the support. "It's why I do this now. Every life I can save, every person I can help recover... it's for her."

Raaj is quiet for a moment, then says, "I understand more than you know." He takes a shaky breath. "I had a brother once. He was... he was a good man."

I listen intently as Raaj tells me about his brother standing up to Odex raiders who were trying to assault a woman. The pain in his voice is raw, real.

"They killed him for it," Raaj finishes, his jaw clenched. "Just like that. One good deed, and..."

"I'm so sorry," I whisper, echoing his earlier words.

We sit in silence for a moment, the weight of our shared grief hanging between us.

"You know," I say finally, "sometimes I wonder if it'll ever end. All this killing, all this pain."

Raaj nods slowly. "The galaxy's seen too much of it, that's for sure."

"Yeah," I agree, feeling a strange mix of sadness and hope. "But maybe... maybe that's why what we do matters. Every life saved, every person helped..."

"It's a start," Raaj finishes for me.

I smile at him, feeling a connection I can't quite explain. "It's a start," I echo.

The cool metal of the door handle feels strangely comforting against my skin as Raaj and I walk back to my quarters in silence, the echo of our shared confessions still hanging in the air. There's a new intimacy between us now, a bond forged in the fires of our pasts.

Raaj stops at my door, his eyes lingering on mine for a moment longer than necessary. "Thank you, Alyssa," he says, his voice barely above a whisper. "For sharing your stories with me. It... means a lot."

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