Page 20 of Pete and His Precious

“My secret is that I don’t have a thing for little girls. I checked those books out of the library because I was supposed to be meeting someone to teach me how to draw, because my stick figures look like a solar system gone awry, and I didn’t want to be sued for accidentally drawing something that looked crude or inappropriate on somebody’s face.”

“I don’t understand how that has anything to do with anyone?” Leo says, sounding completely confused.

“I hired someone to give me drawing lessons, and I was going to meet them at the library. Turns out that the person who wasgoing to give me drawing lessons was none other than Naked Animal-Rights Woman.”Sorry Lord.

“So did you take lessons from her?” Cal says from my other side.

Leo ignores him. “So you don’t like little girls? Then why did you check out the books?”

“No, I didn’t take lessons, and I checked out books because I needed an excuse to be in the library. After I saw her there was no way I was going to walk over and introduce myself.”

“But how did you know it was her?” Leo says, raising his arms up and sounding frustrated.

“Because she was sitting there with a pack of crayons sideways beside her. That was how I was going to know it was her, since I hired her online without knowing her name or anything. When I saw her face, I recognized Naked Animal-Rights Woman,”sorry Lord,“And I realized that I needed to have an excuse to be in the library and the first thing I thought of was that I am going to spend the next month as private security for a ten-year-old girl, and I don’t know anything about girls, so I got a few books at the library that might help me relate to ten-year-old girls if I actually read them.”

“Your life is so messed up,” Cal says, shaking his head, and sounding like he wasn’t even breathing hard.

I’m gasping for breath, and Leo is too, which makes me feel a little bit better. It’s frustrating that Cal is in such good shape, although I’m happy for them. He needs to be. After all, that’s his job.

Of course, in my line of work, it’s pretty important that I stay in shape as well.

“So you’re telling me that God brought this woman into your life twice this week, without you even realizing it, and you’re not doing anything about it?”

“That’s why I’m taking this jog,” I say, exasperated. I know it. I know that there is a reason. I know there’s something going on, but I don’t know what it is.

“Maybe God just wants you to learn to love her.”

This is a good point. “So, I’ve taken to calling her Sultry Voice Woman instead of Naked Animal Lady, but I haven’t been doing that just now because I knew you guys wouldn’t recognize her if I said that, and, you’d probably think there was more between us than what there is, but there’s not.”

“I don’t know. Sultry voice kind of sounds... Romantic. Are you romantically interested in Sultry Voice Woman?” Cal says, teasing me.

“No!”

That is not even open for discussion.

“But you bought her dinner today?” Leo says from my other side.

This is the downside of having friends. They’re not going to let it go, and they’re going to make fun of me for the rest of my life about this. So annoying.

“I think you might have a thing for her.”

“Seems like the Lord wants him to have a thing for. Since He keeps bringing them together.” Cal shakes his head. “And yet he keeps fighting it. Pete, go with the Lord’s leading,” Cal says, like that is the rational thing someone should do, when in reality, that is not necessarily what I’m supposed to do at all, in any way.

The guys don’t say anything for a moment, and I appreciate it, because I’m out of breath, and wondering why in the world I thought pushing myself on a hard jog would be a good idea.

“So you’re quitting the force?” Leo says, like that has just penetrated his brain, and he finally processed the fact that I am going to be doing security personal security.

“I didn’t really have much of a choice about that,” I say, grateful the end of the trail is ahead.

Cal pushes hard toward the end and pulls ahead of us. Leo and I both struggled to keep up, running stride for stride.

We burst out of the woods, into the clearing with the picnic tables and pavilion, and we slow to a walk. I put my hands behind my head, as I catch up with Cal who looks like he is barely sweating.

I wish I would have brought a towel, because I feel like I need to wipe my face big time. I look around, don’t see anyone who’s going to faint at the sight, and pick up the bottom of my shirt, wiping my face with that.

At least I don’t feel like I’m a sloppy mess anymore.

“How did you not have much of a choice about that?” Leo says, still panting. He looks as hot and sweaty as I am, but it must be something to do with being a preacher, because he doesn’t lift his shirt up. Although he does wipe his face on his shoulder.

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