Page 121 of My Turn

It was my love for my brother. That never should’ve mattered, but I agonized over it because I knew that in order to have her, he had to die. The me that existed now, here in this hospitalbed, wouldn’t hesitate. I’d been more hands off about it when I killed him. In the midst of the flames, I watched him blink out of existence, but now… Now, I would wrap my fingers around his throat and crush the life out of him. And then, I’d tell Alana. We would have dealt with it. I would’ve shown her who I was immediately and nobody would have the chance to ruin it.

I couldn’t bring myself to be angry at Alicia for calling the police. She’d come downstairs and saw Alana pointing a gun at me. It should’ve gone through my mind that she would do that, but I’d only been concerned with keeping Alana from spiraling and dealing with Alicia together. It was supposed to be fine. The gun wasn’t fucking loaded.It should’ve been fine.

I didn’t know how to explain it to the cops, but I’d spun a story on the spot. I refused to let them think she was some villain. Alicia saw wrong. I’d been showing Alana my gun because she wanted to learn how to use it after she’d been threatened by Mike. It wasn’t loaded and she was feeling out its weight. When the cops showed up, she had flashbacks of when Mike tried to attack her. What happened was their fault and I made sure that everybody knew it.

It didn’t really matter in the end. To them, she’d fucked up by not complying with their demands. Sure, she wasn’t the bad guy, but they still blamed her and that pissed me the fuck off.

Could I manage to kill all of the officers that had been on the scene? Probably not, but maybe. I could play the long game and pick them off slowly. None of them should have the luxury of surviving after what they’d done to her. They’d stolen from me and that wasn’t something I’d ever forgive. I wanted nothing more than to join Alana in whatever afterlife she’d found, but I had to do this first. I had a purpose for now. When it was complete, I’d find her. I would always find her. I promised her forever and she’d asked for no more lies.

The door opened and I saw Charlie’s face. She looked timid, probably afraid of my mental state. That was smart. I’d thought about killing every nurse and doctor who came in here. Instead of acknowledging her, I rolled toward the window, even though it hurt my shoulder. Maybe it’d fuck up the stitches. I had plans of revenge, but if something like blood loss killed me, I wouldn’t complain.

Chapter 45

Jayce

Bringing the bottle to my lips, I did my best to ignore my uninvited company. They’d been on my ass for days; ever since I left the hospital. I didn’t give a single fuck about them right now.

“You need to come,” Dad insisted.

“No.”

Charlie sat down beside me on the couch. “It’s her funeral. If you don’t come, you’ll regret it later.”

I turned to her. “Why? Her funeral doesn’t do anything for me. You want me to watch you put her in the ground? Fuck that.”

“Jayce…”

“Get the fuck out of my house.”

She sighed and shook her head. “You need closure.”

Closure wasn’t necessary. There was no reality where I accepted Alana’s death. I would never let her go and I didn’t intend to live without her. My resolve was unwavering, so much that I didn’t care if it hurt them. It was selfish for people to claim that you should survive for the sake of others. If someone wanted to die, they should be allowed to do that without being made to feel guilty.

I didn’t know how long it took for them to leave. I just continued to drink. Eventually, when the shadows in the living room lengthened, I looked up and saw that I was alone. Given the time, the funeral was probably over by now.

Seeing Alana put in the ground didn’t interest me. She wasn’t going to stay there. There was one place she belonged and that was with me.

I waited until it was after midnight. The alcohol still saturated my blood, but not enough for me to be an idiot. It took me twenty minutes to reach the cemetery, which was dark and quiet. There was a guard who patrolled the grounds, but I’d done this before after Jake died. Easy peasy.

Clearing my throat, I called the security company they employed here. A woman answered after only a few rings.

“Guardian Security.”

“Hello,” I greeted politely. The kindness in my voice sounded foreign to me right now. “I was passing by Starford Cemetery a few minutes ago. My dad is buried there, so I say a prayer every time I drive by.”

“That’s beautiful.”

“Yes, absolutely. Well, I looked at it and saw a car parked in the lot. It didn’t look like the one your guards use, so I turned around to drive by again. Someone in a dark hoodie got out of it and seems to be lurking the grounds. I just wanted to let you know so that you can make sure everything’s okay.”

“Alright, sir. Thanks so much for letting us know. I’ll have them check it out.”

I ended the call, then got out of my car. There was a small office in front of me, so I moved over to it and leaned against the wall. It took enough time that if there was an actual threat, they probably would’ve been gone by now. Well, there was a threat, but I wasn’t going anywhere.

A flashlight beam appeared off to the side just before the guy came into view. He approached my truck slowly, shining the light inside of it. I pushed off the wall and quietly came up behind him. Last time, I’d been careful to avoid him. That wasn’t the plan this time.

Grabbing him by the back of the hair, I slammed his face against the window. Disoriented, he stumbled to the side. I could’ve just killed him, but I needed an outlet, so I put a gloved hand over his mouth and nose while I pinned him to the door. He flailed and tried to pry my hand away, unsuccessfully. After his eyes closed and his body slumped, I tied him up and gagged him, then tossed him into the back seat.

With that out of the way, I grabbed my shovel and headed toward my target.

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