Page 58 of My Turn

“Yeah, thanks.”

Rubbing my sweaty hands on my jeans, I walked down the hall, then knocked on the door. Carl Moore opened it and offered me a polite smile, gesturing me inside. I awkwardly slid past him and looked at the couch. Charlie and Sara were seated close together on one side, Jayce was beside them, and Ron was in an armchair. The group on the couch squeezed closer together to make room.

I sat beside Jayce, who smiled warmly. “You good?”

“Mhm.”

Crossing one leg over the other, I tried to lean further into the arm of the couch. It made me wince from the sharp sting between my legs. It still hurt like a bitch, but it had dulled slightly. Now, the damn thing had added itchiness as my arch nemesis. I couldn’t scratch it and even if I could, that wasn’t a socially acceptable thing to do in public.

Didn’t they have a conference room they could do this in? Carl’s office felt more like a place to tell a professional why your brain was fucked up.

“Thanks for coming,” Sara whispered loudly, reaching over to squeeze my shoulder.

“Of course. You guys are family.”

I looked at Carl and waited for him to start speaking. When he did, I had a hard time staying present. A lot of this made little sense to me and even the parts that did were confusing. It sounded like so much work and I didn’t know why it had to be so complicated. Frankly, I wasn’t sure why the stepdad wasn’t an easy choice, considering he’d raised her.

It was selfish of me to wish they’d just let that happen, but I couldn’t help feeling that way at times. I wanted them to have this, I really did. The problem was that I didn’t know how I would handle it if they did get custody, even partial.

It wasn’t Alicia’s fault, obviously. That didn’t change the fact that she was a product of my fiancé sticking it in my ex best friend. And it was after everything that happened with her. That was beyond a betrayal. I knew that she’d died, but I didn’t even think to associate her with Jake in any way. It was unfathomable that he would sleep with her.

Apparently, I was once again blind to what my relationship with Jake was really like. Someone who really loved you didn’t cheat on you. They didn’t lie about so many things. They didn’ttry to win custody of a child their fiancé knew nothing about without bringing it up first.

Jayce dipped his head close to my ear. “I can tell you’re losing it right now. Breathe.”

Ignoring him, I fidgeted in my seat. It was so uncomfortable with all of us here. Every time I moved, his elbow jabbed into my ribs. When he noticed, he put his arm over the back of the couch.

“Anything to add to that, Alana?”

I looked at Carl in surprise. “What?”

“We were discussing the reasons why the Westes would be better suited to control Alicia’s estate.”

“No, I think you covered everything.”

Ron frowned, which made me feel bad. I hadn’t been listening, so I had no idea what they’d even covered.

“Sorry,” I backtracked. “My head is sort of jumbled.”

“Well,” Carl started, leaning forward. “With the addition of the Westes, the circumstances of the divorce proceedings, and the mother’s wishes made clear before her death, it could be a simple case. The issue is the lack of any prior relationship. I think it’s in their best interest to proceed with seeking guardianship while we’re dealing with this. It’ll show their interest in being a permanent part of Alicia’s life and that they have her best interests in mind. The fact that none of you were aware that Mr. Weste had a daughter works in your favor because there was no intent to avoid a relationship. As for the specifics of seeking guardianship or visitation, you’d have to speak to someone who specializes in that area.”

“What do you need from me? Just say it and I’m game.”

“You’ve known the family for a long time and you’re not biologically related. You can speak on their character, as well as substantiate their claim of ignorance regarding their granddaughter.”

“Okay,” I said with a slow nod. That was something I could do and it wouldn’t be difficult. All I had to do was tell the truth.

He started going on about real property and personal property- something about land Hailey’s family had owned in Wyoming for generations. It wasn’t important to me. Whatever she did or didn’t have when she died didn’t matter. I had no idea how much money was left to Alicia between her parents, nor did I care to. The real, human life involved was the only thing that kept me in my seat the entire time. When he finally said he’d see us on a date I hadn’t paid attention to, I said quick goodbyes and rushed out the door.

I knew that I’d come across as rude today, but I was so tired. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. Ever since Halloween, I’d been sleeping worse than ever. When I was awake, I constantly looked over my shoulder. I knew I was being watched, but I couldn’t figure out how or where. It was the most nerve-racking experience and it never ended.

When I got into my car, I saw Jayce heading toward me. I loved the guy, but couldn’t he leave me alone just once? I didn’t want to be around people all the time. Meeting his eyes, I shook my head and backed out of the spot. He didn’t look happy, but he’d be fine. If he really wanted to, he could show up at my place. It seemed to be everyone’s modus operandi these days anyway.

Since I was out of milk and a few other things, I pulled into the parking lot of a store near my apartment. I hurried inside, not bothering to grab a basket. If I did, it would only make me buy more.

After I grabbed the milk, I cradled it in my elbow while I went down a couple of aisles, remembering more things I needed. Now that I thought about it, I couldn’t recall the last time I’d actually grocery shopped. I’d been doing exactly this- picking things up here and there. I wasn’t going to do it now, so I cut myself off and went to the checkout line. My arms were so fullthat I just had to dump everything on the self-checkout counter before I began scanning.

Something touched my shoulder and I shrieked, whirling around to meet wide eyes. “Jesus, Preston. Don’t come up behind people like that.”

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